Art made science her bitch. Then Show made me its bitch.

Funny story!

After watching North by Northwest the other day, because Santa brought me a copy on Blu-ray since I’ve been a very good girl, I started drooling over the Frank Lloyd Wright-esque house as I always do when I watch it. Which made me nostalgic for Brennan’s old loft on Bones. Which put me in the mood to write a Rewind Recap.

So I put the word out to my friends: “I need an episode which features Brennan’s loft, and doesn’t feature Sweets, because of obvious reasons (SADNESS).” And sure enough, walking archivist Cassidy came up with “Stargazer in a Puddle,” which also has the added bonus of being full of Brennan Family Feelings, which are my absolute kryptonite on this show.

Thus, here we have our last recap of 2014! It’s full of Feelings and Pretty and ZZ Top and stupid beautiful babies being beautifully stupid. What’s not to love?

• We start this episode off with “shoulda worn gumboots” by Brennan and all is right with the world.

  

  Oh my stupid beautiful emotionally damaged repressed babies.

• Oh look at that! It’s Booth and Brennan discussing Angela and Hodgins’ love life! Well, that’s a role reversal. Heh.
• Especially because it’s Booth who brings it up. BOOTH! Mr. “talk to me one more time and I’ll shoot you in the face”! He’s certainly enthusiastic.
• And Brennan isn’t, because she’s heard all this from Angela already. HEE! Oh, Season 2 babies, I missed how much you all used to hang out.
• It turns out Booth’s excitement is one long setup for a Brennan-proposal joke. I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE BOOTH.
• He’s all “HAHA JUST KIDDING except I’m totally not I’d totally marry you right this second but you know JOKES”

• Booth: And [Angela] said…
  Brennan: ‘I’d like to marry you.’
  Booth: Kinda sudden, Bones. Let me think about it.

• HAHAHAHA BOOTH YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW YOU ARE GOING TO BE EATING YOUR WORDS BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW LONG YOU ACTUALLY WILL HAVE TO WAIT TO HEAR THOSE WORDS.
• “You know, psychologists say jokes are how we manifest our hidden desires.” Yeah, Booth.
• Oh, you stupid beautiful babies, you’ve already made me word vomit due to your beautiful stupidity and we’re only 30 seconds into this episode.
• OH MY GOD IT’S CAM FROM MODERN FAMILY. I forgot he had a recurring role in Season 2.
• “Does the word ‘concise’ mean anything to you?!” BWAHAHAHA SNARKY BRENNAN IS SNARKY. I miss that too.
• Aw, the victim is a kid. Booth and Brennan immediately get a Sad.

• Hodgins: [The wedding is going to be] a nice ecumenical service.
  Angela: As long as the reception makes Caligula blush.

• That’s it, that’s Hodgins and Angela in a nutshell.
• Aw, Hodgins and Angela don’t want to discuss child murder in the same breath as their upcoming nuptials. I don’t blame them.

• Angela: Do you want me to change my name?
  Hodgins: Do you want me to want you to change your name?

  Me: You know, Angela, you never technically answer him.

• (And based on Hodgins’ answer, I suspect he really doesn’t care. Also, this is probably one of the many red flags that they weren’t ready to get married yet but WHATEVER SPOILER ALERT FOR A YEAR FROM NOW.)
• Meanwhile, back to the other stupid beautiful babies:
  

  Brennan: Do you know what you’re looking at?
  Booth: Yeah, the neck bone. It’s connected to the shoulder bone.

• HEE.
• Yet instead of sternly correcting him. Brennan indulges him and smiles. FLIRTY BABIES WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?!
• Observe:

  

  She liiiiiikes him

• She merely gently corrects him about what the x-rays mean. Aw, Brennan.

• Booth: Maybe [the victim] was praying?
  Brennan: Four to six hours a day? What did she want so badly?

  Me: Hee.

• Max: “Her father?”
• OH HEY LOOK IT’S FUGITIVE MAX! I forgot he was in this one.
• Dontcha hate it when your fugitive father interrupts your flirty banter with your partner you secretly want to bone?
• Especially when it ends with your partner pulling a gun on said father?
• “I was hoping we could get a drink or something before we got to this part.” LOL Max you’re such an arrogant, charming asshole.
• Interestingly, despite Brennan’s own insistence earlier in season 2 in putting her father away for his crimes, by this point, she refuses to even handcuff him when Booth asks her. It’s a far cry from the woman who called the cops on Max in “The Killer in the Concrete” just a few episodes prior.
• Also: this is further evidence that the security in the Jeffersonian is shite, given that, on top of serial killers breaking in, suspicious packages making it to the lab, girlfriends and children running around willy-nilly and shady, homicidal people working within its walls, a highly recognizable and wanted fugitive waltzing into his famous daughter’s office doesn’t raise anyone’s eyebrows.
• Max came back because he heard Brennan was getting married. HEE. There must be some sort of underground Twitter where conmen like Max can keep apprised of this stuff.
• He might be on the run, but he doesn’t want to miss his daughter’s big day! (As opposed to, you know, her birthdays or graduations or awards or what have you… But let’s not get into that or we’ll be here all night.)
• Meanwhile, Booth is still all about arresting Max.

  

  This is how my family reunions always end, too.

• Which makes me laugh.
• Because a) AWKWARD FAMILY DINNERS FOR $200 ALEX. “Kids, have I ever told you about the time Daddy arrested grandpa in front of Mommy for killing the director of the FBI and general shadiness? Aah, good times.” I live for an episode where this happens.
• and b) The season 2 gag reel. Ahem.
• HA. Obviously Brennan understands why Booth has to arrest Max and waves it off as no big deal. Sorry, Max.
• Oh, silly little Show.
• I NEED TO STOP WE’RE ALREADY AT THE CREDITS WHAT THE HELL.
• Of course Max forged his identity which means they have no record of him other than as an electrician from Oregon. Just like a certain other evil genius. He’s nothing if not thorough.
• LOL, Caroline doesn’t really mind that Max killed Kirby since he was a “crooked son of a bitch.” At least she’s consistent.
• Speaking of which, Max is a cocky bastard.
• (Ugh, Show, I do not have time to get into Brennan’s Daddy Issues right now, the more I see older episodes.)

• Booth: I’m very good at my job.
  Max: Well, you’d have to be to work with my daughter.

• ZING!
• Hasn’t Brennan herself basically said so? I guess we know where she gets it from.
• “You abandoned her as a child. You don’t think she feels that? Every time you pop in and out of her life?” I LOVE THIS SO HARD! I’m always a little fascinated and perplexed at how the show writes Booth’s perception of Max. On the one hand, he admires that Max fights for what he believes in, in his own way, and encourages Brennan to appreciate the shades of grey in her father’s existence. On the other, it seems like in private, he doesn’t fail to call Max out on his bullshit — most recently in Christine’s birthday episode, when he finds out Max never threw a birthday party for his kids. It’s an interesting dichotomy, because in some respects, it’s a little hypocritical: encouraging Brennan to mend fences with her father, while privately admonishing Max for his actions. Yet, I can almost believe it: he knows Brennan secretly wants a relationship with her father and in that respect encourages her to build one, in spite of her pain, because in the end he seems to realize losing her father would hurt her more than shutting him out would. So he urges her to push past her walls to get what she really wants. However, that doesn’t mean he is going to let Max off the hook for being a shitty father. I like it.
• Plus, I love that the writers, here, are telling the audience why Brennan is the way she is, one puzzle piece at a time. Being abandoned, time and time again, hurts her, despite her protests to the contrary, and is part of why those walls of her are so hard to take down.
• “You’re just saying that so I’ll hit you. And it would have worked.” Oh, FOR FUCK’S SAKE MAX. See, this is what I keep saying: Max is fascinating to me, and I don’t doubt that he loves his family, but that fascination is because he’s so self-serving. Max always comes first, I think. I mean, yes, Booth probably is trying to get Max to hit him, but we know Booth’s assessment is true, too. Max, though, doesn’t want to admit that he fucked up and that he fucked his daughter up, so he laughs it off. (Because he probably is borderline sociopathic.)
• ZACK! Oh, baby Zack.

• Brennan: Angela, with all due respect to your art, facial reconstruction is a science.
  Angela: It’s both, babe. And this time, art made science her bitch.

• Me: HEE SASSY!ANGELA. First of all: FUCK YES LET’S RECOGNIZE ANGELA’S TALENTS AS AN ARTIST AND SCIENTIST PLEASE AND THANK YOU. Second of all: ah, don’t you love how quotable this show can be? It’s infamous, now.
• HEE. It’s the Zack Face! He doesn’t know how to handle it.
  
• Brennan: We should look for any other indication that we may have got her age wrong.
  Zack: Because art made science her bitch?
• Oh, you precious flower, you. I’m not at all part of the “Bring Zack Back!” brigade, but, he was pretty adorable while he was with us.
• Hee, I enjoy Brennan’s amused smirk as Angela word-vomits and she just wants her to spit it out already.
• Except, that word vomit is Angela asking Brennan to be her maid of honour, and Brennan’s face immediately changes, from amusement to complete shell-shock and awe.

  

  Sweet babies

• Emily Deschanel does such a good job, because in a split second, Brennan looks like her breath catches and she gasps — like she is truly bowled over by the request, as though someone just told her she won a Nobel prize or something.
• And then she grabs Angela in a giant bear hug, from which she cannot let go for a slightly awkward amount of time, but it’s completely endearing.

  

  All the “Brengela” BFF feelings.

• I think it’s a wonderful juxtaposition to the previous scene, where Booth confronts Max. Because Brennan’s reaction here? Is a direct result of that. Brennan spent so much time alone and friendless because of Max’s actions, that she probably never thought she’d have a friend close enough to her to be asked to be maid of honour.
• You know, for all the concern on the show (and on the internet) over Brennan’s lack of social skills, this really does give you insight into who Brennan is. When she finally does connect with someone — like Angela — she is open and wholly loving. No one needs to explain what an honour it is to be asked to stand by Angela’s side on her wedding day; she understands it instinctively, and in fact is completely blindsided by the fact that her best friend would even consider her for the role. (I mean, I was touched when my friends asked me to be their bridesmaids or maid of honour, but, I’m pretty sure I didn’t look like someone just told me I was cured of a fatal disease or anything, like Brennan practically does here.) Which, again, speaks to Brennan’s self-esteem issues, because she went for years thinking she wasn’t that kind of person, would never be that kind of person, because she wasn’t good enough, plain and simple. (Which, you know, is a direct result of your entire family leaving you as a kid and finding out years later they knew where you were, but never bothered to contact you, Max.)
• Point being, Brennan’s reaction always touches me, and makes my heart break for her a little, too. She doesn’t take friendship lightly, at all.
• “I’m completely, totally honoured. […] I don’t even care how awful the bridesmaids dresses are! I’m so glad you asked me!” BRENNAN LET ME HUG YOU AND SQUISH YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE TOO ADORABLE AND TRAGIC. Sigh. It’s so sweet, yet so sad at once.
• So let’s focus on the sweet, shall we?
• Like how Brennan doesn’t even question wearing ugly dresses for her best friend’s sake? (And spoiler alert, she’s right. In the bridesmaids sweepstakes, I think Angela lucked out. Probably because Brennan told her to wear whatever she wanted from her closet.)
• Brennan’s just hanging out at home with her non-fugitive father! Well, its a start.
• Brennan, what are you wearing?! It’s a puffy shirt over a long-sleeved t-shirt and I’m confused. (Season 2 had a lot of weird choices like that.)

  

  So many layers. Maybe Brennan’s loft is really cold?

• Anyway, Max has set Russ up at a chop shop in an undisclosed location, because he is on a “slippery slope.” OF MAX’S DOING! I mean — yes, Russ is a big boy and made his own terrible choices, so he has to own up to them. But on the other hand: most fathers don’t ask their sons who they haven’t seen in over a decade to go on the lam with them, because that is terrible parenting.
• Brennan is really pretty.

  

  Just hanging out with Dad like he’s not a fugitive

• “It’s nice to see you smile. That’s something.” Oh, Max, you dolt.
• But for a split second, Brennan indulges in this feeling — of hanging out with her dad and joking about her family’s foibles. Because so much of her missed this, and wants this now.
• But then reality sets in, and she reminds him Booth is going to find him out sooner or later, because Booth always does, and this is ephemeral.
• Oh my God. Brennan looks so young when she shrugs and tugs at her sleeves and asks Max if he came back just to give her an update on Russ.

  

  Actual 12 year old Brennan

• You know part of her is just begging for Max to tell her he came back for her, just for her, because she’s spent half her life wishing for that. Yet, because she knows what happens in her family, she can’t let herself hope that her dad would come back for her. (Since, as I said, her family fucked her up good.)
• Instead, Max kind of meets her halfway, and gives her a ring that supposedly belonged to her grandmother. (Brennan’s “I have a grandmother?” just slays me — this is the kind of thing to which most people don’t give a second thought, but Brennan’s childhood was so chaotic she can’t even conceive of such normal familial relationships. Sigh.)
• HEY IT’S THE RING! I’ll give the show this, they’re definitely consistent with their props. It’s nice to see, nearly ten years later.
  
• On the other hand, all of this is too much for Brennan; realizing she has a father and a brother and a grandmother and all these other relatives she had to actively suppress for so long because it hurt too much to think they could be out there without her. So up go her walls, after a brief dismantling for old times’ sake. She actually has to leave the table, and claims she has to go to bed because work beckons. Because it’s always about work when Brennan can’t deal.
• Except, she can’t quite push it away, and instead extends an olive branch to her dad. She hesitantly asks him to spend the night at her house, and once more, it’s both touching and heartbreaking. Touching because we all know how big a step this is for her, to open up and let her dad into her life like this in spite of how much he hurt her, yet heartbreaking because the mere fact that she questions whether her father would want to spend time with her like that speaks volumes about how damaged she is and their relationship is.
• Plus, it’s the little details that get me, like how Brennan specifies that she’d already prepared her guest room for him before he even came over, in the hopes that he would want to stay with her. This whole thing isn’t easy for her, but she wants it so badly that just like a kid at Christmas, she’s hoping she’ll get her wish tonight. UGH MY FEELINGS.
• Especially because she can’t even bring herself to finish that sentence after “in case…” It’s too much to hope for.
  
• And then she very tentatively kisses him goodnight, and it’s almost too much. It’s a little awkward, but it’s also probably almost second-nature to her, because that’s likely exactly how she kissed him goodnight every night until she was 15. Old habits die hard.
• And I have to give Ryan O’Neal credit, here: as selfish and jovial as Max usually is, he really does look incredibly touched at Brennan’s gesture, and doesn’t take it lightly. (If only he could continue being so cognizant of that fact.)
  
• “Who is this guy? Some kind of super criminal?” HA, Caroline, you have no idea how prescient you are about bad guys wiping themselves out of The System. (DRINK!)
• I love Caroline.
• And I love Caroline and Booth’s relationship.
• (More, please.)
• Like, for instance, this exchange about his arresting Max:
  

  Booth: Bones gets it.
  Caroline: You hope she does.

• Meanwhile: ZACK FACE! Hee.
  
• “You’re not wrong, which is not the same as being right.” I feel like this needs to be shouted from the proverbial rooftops on social media. Thanks, Zack.
• I also feel like it took the team a really long time to figure out why these child’s bones were so “old,” and subsequently took so long to get the missing child photo off the database. Like, I’m pretty sure there aren’t tons of kids with progeria being kidnapped in the US. (Just like how in “Signs in the Silence,” it took them an entire episode to find the victim’s real parents, when I’m pretty sure a deaf preschooler would be a pretty unique hit on their databases.)
• Aw, Brennan praises Angela’s work!
• LOL, Hodgins asks Zack to be his best man and Zack, unlike Brennan, could not have cared less.
• But: Aw, Hodgins wants Zack to be his best man!
• Yo, Booth, don’t go critiquing the victim’s artwork as “childish.” Those paintings look better than anything I could probably draw. (Then again, Booth does have a secret artistic side, as we all know.)
• Ah, the (SPOILER ALERT guilty) mother incriminates a caretaker in her daughter’s death when she was responsible. Lovely.
• (On the other hand, I think the actress did a good job of displaying the mother’s disgust when she believed the caretaker molested her daughter.)
• Oh man, they’re using a CRT TV in the interrogation room and I’m feeling oddly nostalgic.
• Meanwhile, Booth stares deep into suspect number 2’s eyes to look for Truthiness.
• Apparently, this ring of Brennan’s is passed down from oldest daughter to oldest daughter in her mother’s family. Show, I want to know more about Brennan’s extended family, please. And I don’t just mean stunt casting a Deschanel sibling for a one-off appearance.
• (So does this mean Christine gets the ring when she’s older? Aw.)
• I like how, unlike the surprise of the night before, this time Brennan kind of calls Max out about how he told her and Russ they didn’t have any relatives. (While Max is all, “LOL sorry, we upended your entire lives and fled justice, you know how it goes.”)
• (This also contradicts Brennan’s mention of having a grandfather back in early season 1, but I suppose that can always be fanwanked away/ignored.)
• I love how Brennan doesn’t take any of it and asks him, “what’s the truth?” She won’t stand for bullshit, either.
• And doesn’t quite know if she believes his story that her mother is the oldest of three sisters and happened to have all these family traditions that conveniently were wiped out when they became the Brennans.
• (In my head canon Brennan ends up “recreating” this sisterly dynamic with her own kids, but again I don’t think I’m going to be right about that because I don’t think the show’s going to remember this scene “nine” months from now and baby #2 is going to be a boy because TV likes to alternate sibling genders but WHATEVER NOT BITTER.)
• Max says if she wants to seek her family out, she just has to show them the ring and they’ll know who she is. What, so she can beckon them like in fucking Captain Planet?! Seriously, Max?! I’m pretty sure this is why people use telephones and Facebook, instead.
• UGH I JUST LOVE THIS. Brennan’s asking about her family, and I really wish they’d followed through on that more. The show’s not over yet, but I know they’ll never touch upon this backstory ever again.
• This all being said, I like that Max answers that her mother was all the family he needed, along with Brennan and Russ. My head canon is that Max had a rough childhood of his own, but that meeting Ruth was his saving grace. Well, you know, aside from the whole bank robbing thing they loved to do, which is a whole other ball of wax.
• UGH HER FACE!

  

  BABY

• This is too much for her to bear, and she’s barely hanging on and starting to tear up. Poor Brennan. Families are overwhelming enough without the criminal element to throw you for a loop. Once Max says that their family was all he needed, she snaps, because if that were true, why the fuck would he leave her, then? She’s been bottling this up for the past day — and the past year, really — and she’s losing it.

• Brennan: You abandoned me for fifteen years.
  Max: And I’ll do whatever I can to make repairs.

• Me: Like what, you made a fucking accounting mistake? Oh, Max.
• But, he’s let off the hook, because he has a message from her mother (on videotape! Oh the 90s) he wants to give her. You know, Max, you had fifteen years to get this tape to her, but, whatever.
• You know, seeing Max in this scene, I could pretend he looks enough like the current kid who plays Christine. So good on you, casting department.
• Back at the lab, Zack still won’t answer Hodgins about being best man, because he has a letter from the President asking him to go to Iraq. Oh, poor stupid sweet Zack, who is a genius but actually really naive, and thinks that a letter from the President is personally addressed to him and he has to obey it. Oh, Zack.
• I love how Hodgins categorically refuses to accept it, and wants to keep Zack by his side, because no way is his best friend going to Iraq, no matter the reason.
• Zack is 12.
• Oh, Zack: he then refuses to be Hodgins’ best man, because if he dies in Iraq, Hodgins won’t be able to remember his wedding without sadness. You stupid beautiful baby, you.

• Hodgins: Everything isn’t rational.
  Zack: It should be.

• I feel like the fact that Brennan turns into basically this several seasons from now is important, but I can’t bring myself to delve into that right now.
• Leave it to Brennan to point out that the victim’s drawings were accurate representations of constellations.
• And of course, we find out Brennan has a favourite constellation: it’s Delphinus, which was also her mother’s favourite, and something they shared. MY FEELINGS. Brennan doesn’t usually get this personal with suspects, which Booth notices.
• Also: points to Show for remembering the dolphin love all these years later.
• (Is more backstory too much to ask for, Show?)
• My, the mother goes crazy mighty quickly.
• LOL, Hodgins must be desperate to actually ask Booth to be his best man.
• No bachelor party, but, “stand there, make a toast, hand over the ring, tongue-kiss the maid of honour at the reception when people clink glasses…” Well when you put it that way, Hodgins.
• Again: the fact that Hodgins doesn’t even realize Brennan would obviously be Angela’s maid of honour speaks volumes about how they really weren’t ready to be getting married if they didn’t even know these basic facts about one another. But we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.
• Because we have bigger fish to fry right now.
• Like how Booth is all excited about making out with bridesmaids until Brennan informs him she is the maid of honour, said making out being unbeknownst to her. HEE. Oh silly Show and your obvious ploys at making us see that B&B need to put their faces on each other.
• Also HEE Booth’s face when he realizes what he just said.

  

  Oops.

• So many flip phones, so little time. Oh, 2007.
• Also: Hodgins forgot about Angela’s dad. You poor, stupid man. Heh.
• Brennan figured out the mother has AIDS! They should ask Cam!
• OH HEY CAM YOU’RE ACTUALLY IN THIS EPISODE! I forgot Cam was in this one.
• It’s so weird seeing Cam with such long hair, since she’s had a bob for so many seasons now.
• Heh, Hodgins and Zack asked Cam to supervise their experiment because she said she’d fire them if they didn’t. “Boys, you’ve got Spam and sea chimps. You get anything from that and I– will buy you each a car.” Oh Cam, so delightfully sassy.
• (Zack says “I find this anticlimactic” after the sea chimps fail to deliver and suddenly this entire brief scene is a metaphor for me for season 10 but I’m not even going there.)
• Back at the Diner of Unresolved Feelings, Booth and Brennan are discussing family, and excuse me there will be more word vomit imminently:

• Brennan: Do you like your father?
  Booth: I love my father.
  Brennan: I think I love my father.
  Booth: Well, that’s normal.
  Brennan: But he ran out on me! And Russ! He robbed people! He’s a murderer. He got my mother killed. How does he expect me to–
  Booth: It’s hard to trust someone who abandoned you. Especially a parent.

• OK, let’s unpack this portion of the scene for a minute, shall we?
• Firstly, I love watching Brennan grappling with her feelings for her father. I love that she’s confused about loving her father, because I think too often on TV people are just automatically assumed to love their parents, but you know, sometimes those feelings are really muddled. Brennan doesn’t even know her father, not really: even the man who raised her for fifteen years is a stranger to her, because he never really existed. And he’s the same man who abandoned her and indirectly put her in danger, and the same man who’s abandoned her several times since. I think it’s normal for Brennan to be confused, and I love that she’s allowed to be confused. And that she thinks she does still love her father, but it doesn’t make sense to her, because he’s done so many awful things that she’d be within her rights not to. But, the heart wants what it wants.
• Secondly, Booth’s answer is interesting, given what we know now. They might not have had his full backstory conceived at this point, but I like that there are little nods that we can interpret that way now. Because Booth would love his father, despite him being a bastard, because that’s who Booth is, and we know it. (Plus, Booth is also a) standoffish about his personal life and b) deeply in denial about these things.) Yet, when he tells her that it’s hard to trust a parent who leaves you, we now know Booth is speaking from experience, too. (Twice over, in fact.) I don’t know if they’d thought of that yet in season 2, but I like that this still fits in with the canon we know now in season 10. Thanks, Show.

• Brennan: Am I terrible for not wanting to let myself care about my own father?
  Booth: Look, Bones, your father is going to do something tomorrow that’ll hurt you. How do you forgive that?
  Brennan: I’m not a bad daughter? A bad person?
  Booth: You’re not a bad anything.

• 

  No reason for posting this. None at all. Ahem.

• Again: firstly, Brennan? Let me hug you. Lots. Because this is her in a nutshell: she loves her father in spite of herself, but she doesn’t want to, because she knows it’s going to hurt her, one way or another. Yet, we’re so preconditioned to love our parents unfailingly that it’s confusing when you don’t want to, when you actively resist those feelings because it’s not healthy for you. And I love that Booth understands that — especially because as we know now, Booth is speaking from experience, too. (I know at this point Booth should have shared his own crappy parenting stories with Brennan, but the writers probably hadn’t gotten there yet, so I’m letting it slide.)
• Plus, you know, this all speaks to Brennan’s self-esteem issues and about how she constantly worries that she isn’t capable of being that person, even though we know she always has been.
• Secondly: STUPID BEAUTIFUL BABIES JUST KISS ALREADY. Look at those goddamn flirty looks and Booth making love eyeballs at his partner.
  
• Of course Booth loves Sea Chimps. Second only to pudding.
• In other news, the victim was killed by her own mother, from an overdose of AIDS medication. Lovely.

• Mother: You don’t understand.
  Brennan: I don’t think you’ll ever find anyone who does.

• SASSY BRENNAN IS SASSY and I love it. I love Indignant!Brennan.
• “You threw away your own daughter. Why would I do you a favour?” FUCKING A. Ugh, like I said, I love when Brennan gets all fired up. Especially when it’s a thinly-veiled reflection of what is going on in her personal life, like here. (Because Brennan’s coming to grips with being “thrown away” by her own parents. Sometimes Brennan is a kickass scientist, sometimes Brennan is a damaged fifteen year old girl.)
• Back at the FBI: CHARLIE!!!!!!
  
• It’s been too long, pal.
• (Charlie feels like one of those guys who has been on this show forever, but was actually only ever in, like, three episodes.)
• (Because as backshootingford likes to point out, he’s now living in the Jeffersonian basement with FML FBI tech.)
• Max knocked over a convenience store, but stopped long enough before fleeing to press napkins onto the poor cashier’s head to stop the bleeding? What a swell guy. (I never noticed before how I assume this is part of Max’s charm — he might be a thief, but at least he cares enough to help the people he robs!)
• (Also: this isn’t the “harmless” safety deposit box ransacking the show likes to paint Max as doing. This is armed robbery, Show. Like I keep saying: Max may be charming, but he’s a shady dude.)
• HEY IT’S ZZ TOP!
• Which means things will go sideways fast.
• Especially since Hodgins greets his future father-in-law by imitating his music. Yeah, Hodgins, that’s a great way to endear yourself to anyone, especially your scary Texan father-in-law.

• Hodgins: You know about the wedding, right?
  ZZ Top: Oh yes. It’s no coincidence I’m here.

• My goal in life is to be as deadpan as ZZ Top.
• “You’re making a huge mistake, son. […] If Angie finds out that a man, you, asked another man, me, for her hand, or any other of her fine parts, horrible complications would ensue. […] You could get both of us killed.” PREACH IT ZZ TOP. The women on this show will have nothing to do with your antiquated, sexist traditions, and the men who know them best will tell you so.
• (Which is why I love that Hodgins and Angela’s eventual wedding really is all about just the two of them.)
• LOL, could ZZ Top have any more disdain for Hodgins when he says “if you do, you do, if you don’t, you don’t?” (I don’t blame him. Hodgins isn’t making the best first impression here.)
• I don’t care that this scene is just a blatant excuse to watch ZZ Top play the blues.
• Anyway, it’s time for our Blues Montage, because Booth and Cam determine the DNA on the discarded 40 year old napkin matches Max’s DNA, which means Brennan is going to have a Sad soon.
• Every time I see this shot, I think, for a split second, that Brennan is giving Max the finger, and it amuses me, because I’m 12.

  

  Here’s what I really think, Dad.

• Max, why wouldn’t you have brought the videotape to Brennan when you first saw her in this episode? Anyway.
• It matters not, for now Booth is attempting to arrest Max. Pass the turkey plate, y’all! THANKSGIVING DINNER OF OUR DISCONTENT 2015 OR BUST EVERYONE.

• Max: I can’t surrender. You’re going to have to shoot me. You understand.
  Booth: Not your nature?!

• Oh, beautiful fucked up family dynamics! HEE!
• I don’t know why Max asking Booth to shoot him in the leg makes me laugh so much, but it does.
• KA-POW! Booth punches Max in the face! HELL YES HE DOES! Someone had to do it. I’m pretending Booth clocked Max on Brennan’s behalf.
• “Kids, have I ever told you about the time Daddy punched Grandpa in the face, and then he punched Daddy back? Good times.”
• BWAHAHAHA THEN HE PUNCHES BOOTH IN THE NUTS.
• Because apparently they are 12.
• Max, you’re lucky you have grandchildren now, that’s all I’m saying. That’s valuable merchandise, ifyouknowwhatImean.

  

  Yeah, not even going to say what this looks like. AHEM. (I’m 12.)

• I mean, LOOK AT THEM.

  

  Is this the yearly Festivus Airing of Grievances? Can I pretend?

• I’m choosing to believe this is exactly what happened after this scene ended.
• Aw, isn’t that cute, Brennan still owned a VCR in 2007.
• Which is apparently hooked up not to a TV, but a Dell computer monitor, but minor detail.
• It doesn’t matter, because we are getting ready for some Feelings with Brennan, as she’s finally watching her mom’s video.
• OK, it’s no accident that Brennan’s mom is wearing almost exactly what Brennan used to wear throughout season 1, right?
• I mean, this is a terrible screenshot, but it’s a long-sleeved shirt, flowy boho skirt and chunky belt — Brennan’s favourites from last year!

  

  Why couldn’t you have turned around before sitting down, Ruth? You’re cramping my recap style, woman.

• (But I’ve already written Feelings about this.)
• Never mind that “Shot in the Dark” six years later totally changes Brennan mère’s style, we will cross that bridge when we get to it.
• This version of Brennan’s mom also reminds me a lot of Lauren Graham, for some reason.

  

  Where you lead, I won’t follow, because I have no idea where you are because you left me BYE

  (Is it weird that this is my favourite version of Brennan’s mom?) Except, now that I think about it, she sounds a little like Janel Maloney. And now I’m confused.

• Oddly for me, I’m not going to transcribe her mom’s entire speech, because this is getting long enough as it is.
• “People were going to kill you, but NBD, let’s talk about the weather.” Thanks, Mom.
• Oh, God.
• Brennan’s face when her mom tells her she’s taping this on her 16^th birthday.

  

  BAAAABY someone needs to hug you right now

• FEEEEEELINGS.
• What strikes me now is that Brennan starts crying, in spite of herself, basically as soon as her mom’s face appears on screen. She spends so much time trying to hold herself together, but I think her mom has always been her Achilles heel.
• So Mom is talking about the family heirloom ring and it now makes me wonder if it’s a ring she always had on that Brennan just never asked about growing up, or was told another story about it, or if on the way out of running out on her family Mom decided to stop by the house to dig out her heirloom ring… Just saying.
• “You’re gonna hear a lot of things about your parents. Especially your father. He’s a good man.” SHOW SERIOUSLY STOP THE DADDY ISSUES PARALLEL KTHXBAI.
• Interestingly, she says Max would have kept the family together, and she was the one who insisted on running away to keep the kids safe. I mean, I understand that from a theoretical point of view, and yes given what happened to Ruth/Christine, it might have been for the best, but I think leaving your 15 year old in the care of her barely adult brother without any kind of backup plan is almost as damaging. I’m just saying, neither of them are winning Parent of the Year awards, ever. (That’s not even including the fact that they were robbing banks, apparently just for kicks, while their kids slept at night, then got themselves embroiled in a gang that almost cost them their lives. Can you tell I’m not impressed with the Keenan parents?)
• “I need you to forgive me. And if you can’t forgive me, I beg you honey, forgive your father. Because he is a very good man.” Holy shit, no wonder Brennan is so insistent on calling Booth a “good man,” am I right?! DADDY ISSUES MY FRIENDS. But more importantly, excuse the hell out of you, Ma Brennan. I’m sorry, but when you a) lie to your kids their entire lives about your identities because of your colossal fuckup and b) leave said kids to fend for themselves without a trace, you don’t get to ask them for forgiveness. That’s their call, not yours.
• Jesus, no wonder Brennan is so fucked up.
• ANYWAY.
• Let’s focus on the sweeter part of this message: “Remember this: you were cherished in this world. Adored. What I did may have been wrong, but I did it out of love. I did it out of love.”
• Well, the first part of that statement, anyway: One thing that’s been clear in all the flashbacks and anecdotes over the years about Brennan’s childhood is that she was adored by her family. She may have been a misfit at school who had few, if any, friends, but time and time again we see that her parents and brother loved her wholeheartedly and unequivocally nurtured her, quirks and all. (Like, not once has Russ or Max said Brennan was “weird”; they’ve both defended Brennan and said there was nothing wrong with her interests as a kid.) So good on you, Ma Brennan, for cherishing your daughter. I’ll give you that.
• But, I’m still not letting you off the hook, “out of love” or not.
• However, Brennan is a much better person than I.
• I do find it interesting that she kind of regroups and hesitates when her mom says she did it out of love — there have to be loads of conflicting emotions happening.
  
• I also find it amazing that they apparently did this scene in one take for Emily Deschanel. I forget if it was the episode commentary or what, but Stephen Nathan or Hart Hanson said something to the effect that she just sat down there and went through that whole range of emotion without a single line of dialogue. So kudos to Emily for being a wonderful actress.
• Sidebar: I was searching my Tumblr tags for this episode, to figure out if I actually had written a recap for it already because I remember writing something, but couldn’t find it. Anyway, I came across this post, about the original casting sides for this episode, which I thought was some wonderful insight into what the writers were trying to accomplish with this scene, and how the sentiment would reappear six years later in “Shot in the Dark.” Basically: Brennan has major self-esteem issues and poor baby needed a hug badly. And it was even sadder in the original draft of the script.
• However, she pulls herself up by the bootstraps, and uses her personal pain to instead empathize with the victim’s mother. “You did what you did out of mercy.” Again, Brennan is a better person than I, because I don’t think I’d be so understanding of a woman who killed her own daughter just because she thought no one could take care of her after she died. (Filed under Ways Brennan’s Parents Have Warped Her But It’s OK.)
• “What you did was wrong, but you did it out of love.” Man, there are a lot of parents out there making terrible life choices.
• Look at Brennan’s face. This is not a woman who is at all cold; she’s hurting for both this woman and her dead daughter, and for her own mother and herself. Sigh.

  

  I forgot how much crying was in this episode

• In happier news, Hodgins and Angela are getting married, in an oddly traditional setting! I shouldn’t judge, though, given Booth and Brennan’s eventual nuptials.
• (I’m pretty sure this is the same church from Phyllis’ wedding on The Office? Hee.)
• Holy shit, I’ve never noticed how many flower petals are in that aisle. That’s a lot of flowers!

  

  Are there any flowers left in DC?

• First of all: what the FUCK is this bridesmaid dress you’re making your friends wear, Angela? (Apparently, I’ve gotten off lucky in my day.)

  

  Angela, do you hate your friends?

• Second: what the FUCK is this purse? It’s like one of those plastic pumpkins kids use for trick-or-treating at Halloween.
  
• Third: it doesn’t matter how ugly the dress is, smitten Booth is smitten. HEE. Stupid beautiful babies, you don’t even know how much longer it will take the two of you to figure your shit out.

  

  Gulp.

• Bless you, Cam, for taking Brennan under your wing and helping her alter her dress on the fly so it’s less ugly.
• Meanwhile, poor baby Zack is wearing a leisure suit because OF COURSE HE FUCKING IS.

  

  But did this suit come from a Jeffersonian exhibit?

• And he’s bugging Booth about Iraq. HEE.
• “Does it hurt to get shot? I’ve been blown up, which wasn’t as bad as I expected, but I’ve never been shot.” HEE. Oh, poor baby Zack, you have no idea.
• HEE, I love that Cam draws Booth’s attention to Brennan’s makeover. Even in season 2, she knew what was up, and was going to meddle in her own way.

  

  Cam ships it.

• Especially because Booth is doing a piss-poor job of hiding it. Meaning: he isn’t trying AT ALL. GO PUT YOUR FACE ON HER FACE ALREADY.

  

  Hearts in his eyes, you guys.

• Obviously Booth would choose walking down the aisle at a friend’s wedding to apologize to Brennan for arresting her father. King of bad timing, this one.
• (Even awkward Brennan is like, “dude, chill until we aren’t in a fucking wedding.”)
• HA! Of course Angela would walk down the aisle to a harpist covering “Gimme All Your Lovin’.” OF COURSE SHE WOULD.

  

  Happiest harpist ever. This is her jam, y’all.

• (Also loving that she has a lady minister.)
• It took me about two years to figure out this song was “Gimme All Your Lovin’” and when I figured it out I was like OF COURSE IT FUCKING IS.
• Booth, I love you, but SHUT UP ALREADY. This is so not the time to spill your guts to Brennan.
• But, like me, he is overcome with The Feelings and can’t let Brennan go a second longer thinking her dad abandoned her again — and has to let her know that this time, her dad got himself arrested precisely to prove he isn’t leaving her again. Aw, Booth.
• However, this is a nice fringe benefit of said gut-spilling:

  

  Hearts. In. Eyes.

  

  Babies.

• Not entirely convinced this wasn’t all just a ploy by Angela to make Brennan and Booth confront their feelings in a loaded setting.
• “Hi. I’d like to get married now.” OH WOULD YOU NOW ANGELA.

  

  Don’t worry you two. You only have to wait another seven years for your turn.

• What is with Angela’s weird Red Riding Hood getup, though? I mean, I think the dress is pretty nice, the veil is… different. Whatever floats your boat, Ange.
  
• But: Aw, Angela and Hodgins are getting married, yay!
• (Hold that thought.)
• Jack Stanley Hodgins and Angela Pearlygates Montenegro. HEE.
• (I mean, first of all, I’m sure “Jack” would have been short for “John” given his pedigree, but whatever. And Angela chose Pearlygates as a middle name? Oh Angela.)
• I love this minister.

  

  How about a two for one, everybody?

• Speaking of crappy parents: what dad leaves his daughter’s wedding in the middle of her ceremony?! Not cool, ZZ Top.
• Aw Angela and Hodgins are so pretty.

  

  Also Angela is so much taller than Hodgins heh.

• Naturally, Hodgins and Angela’s wedding is interrupted yet again by the State Department. Because of course it is.
• And naturally, Caroline is all, “welp, let’s get this shit over with” and assumes her role as their counsel. I love Caroline.

  

  We should all be so lucky to have Caroline interrupt our nuptials.

• Zack passes the time by bugging Booth about dodging bullets. Heh. Then it turns serious because he leaves it to Booth to explain his upcoming absence to the rest of the team. Because Booth knows more about “duty and honour” than anyone else Zack knows. Aww, poor baby Zack. Don’t do it, man. It’s gonna ruin your life in ways you don’t even know.
• /Iraq PTSD fanwanking for Gormogon story
• Meanwhile, Angela’s already married because she jumped over a broomstick with a guy in Fiji because OF COURSE SHE FUCKING IS. She would.
• Wow, Angela calls Hodgins “Jack”; I feel like she used to do that a lot in the first two seasons and she hasn’t done it since.
• HEE! Angela’s embarrassed about what they’re going to tell their guests, and Caroline, my hero, tells them to scram and get out of here before anyone figures it out. CAROLINE I LOVE YOU. You want her in your corner when you’re bailing out of your own wedding.
• I love this shot, in all its The Graduate homaging glory.
  
• And I love that they’re exiting this episode with the actual version of “Gimme All Your Lovin’.” (Again, how it took me two years to figure out the harp solo was the same song, I’ll never know.)
• But let’s get back to Silly Little Show being completely ridiculous:

  

  Ridiculous show is ridiculous and I love it.

• “What do we do now?” Oh, I don’t know, Brennan. How about dance around your feelings for your partner for half a decade, flee to opposite ends of the earth, break each other’s hearts, then accidentally make a baby after grieving a co-worker, move in with Booth, go on the lam like your own parents, come back, propose to Booth, get turned down thanks to a serial killer, then finally marry him seven years from now? Sound good?
• (To me, Brennan totally looks like she’s up for some botched-wedding hanky panky. But you know, whatever.)

  

  I think there’s a limo and several champagne bottles with your names on them, guys.

• On a serious note, It’s interesting to me that they deliberately framed Booth and Brennan on the altar like this with the minister, clearly implying nuptials of their own. I always wonder what that line’s supposed to mean — is it Brennan asking what they literally have to do now that their friends have left them in the lurch, or was it supposed to be more abstract than that? (Like, did they just throw that in there in case the show didn’t get renewed and they had a “happy ending” of sorts fans could make their own adventure with?) Ah, mysteries.
• In more pressing matters: RIDICULOUS SHOW IS RIDICULOUS. Of course they set Brennan and Booth up at the church to make us all see the obvious. HEE. Oh, season 2 babies, you have no idea.
• Just saying.

  

  Lady Minister knows, y’all.

Oddly enough, season 2 is one I often overlook, and I always forget just how instrumental it is in laying the foundation of the Brennan Family dynamics for years to come. I’d completely forgotten just how jam-packed “Stargazer in a Puddle” was with not only backstory, but Brennan wrestling with her feelings towards both her parents. And how obvious the writers made Brennan’s current issues a direct result of what happened with her parents as a child.

Brennan’s backstory will always be my downfall on this show — along with everyone else’s. (I want to know what’s up with Angela’s family! Why isn’t her mom here? What’s the deal with her dad? And her name? Give it all to me, Show.) This episode really is a gem in dealing with all of that, and what’s amazing to me is that we’re still grappling with some of these same issues eight years later, yet they’ve evolved in their own ways, too. We learn so much about what drives Brennan’s relationship with her father, and it’s hard not to wish they could just return to their lives fifteen years before when they have the conversation at her loft, or want to hug her when she sees her mom’s face for the first time in as many years on video. It’s no secret that I’d love more of this on the show, and I think this episode speaks volumes about why Brennan still is the way she is with her father, despite the strides they’ve made in the interim. Moreover, it’s a nice parallel to the season 1 finale, where she first learns of her parents‘ secrets.

It’s nice to see a “happy” finale for once (especially given the tumult of the last three seasons’), yet it’s not like the case is a joke; murder is awful, but a murdered child is especially so, no matter the reasons behind it. However, Brennan navigates those emotions with such depth and integrity that it’s impossible not to stand behind her. Meanwhile, we have the zaniness of Angela and Hodgins‘ wedding, and the uncertainty of Zack’s impending departure, and it really was a great setup for season 3’s arc, for better or for worse. (See what I did there?)

Thanks for welcoming me over here in my new home on WordPress, guys! As 2014 comes to a close, I’m really grateful for those of you who have poked your heads in and come to chat for a little bit — it really does make fangirling so much more enjoyable! May 2015 bring us lots more character development to discuss and awkward screenshots to laugh over.

– Innie