Shot Through The Dark, And You’re To Blame

(Originally posted February 17, 2013.)

… Too far? Sorry, I couldn’t help it.

(My alternate title was You Live, You Learn. Which seemed apt. But then I was going to have to quote the entire song. Because I can’t not sing that entire song when it comes on. So. There you go.)

I’m going to try to make this quick, because this thing is long. Fucking long. Like, I think it has actually overtaken the title of Longest Post Ever. (Which is no mean feat, given the explosion of Feelings some episodes have stirred in me, such as the 100^th, or the epic two–parter that was the season 7 finale.) But what could you expect from an episode in which Brennan nearly dies, has some sort of vision of her long-dead mother, Booth is a wonderfully supportive partner and the Squints Get Shit Done.

(Plus: Brennan Family Dynamics = automatic word vomit from me, because it may be my favourite.)

I have to say upfront that I really, really hated the idea, when it was first teased this fall, that Brennan would have some sort of brush with the afterlife (or Heaven or whatever you want to call it), so that coloured my interpretation of this episode. You could say that this entire recap is an attempt to rationalize the irrational, to borrow from the show. I think I made a strong case, even though I’m fully aware that I am batshit crazy and refusing to accept the obvious. LALALALA I CAN’T HEAR YOU WRITERS.

Anyway.

You’re all going to go cross-eyed if you read this whole thing, so you better not even try. And if you do, get snacks. Perhaps a life preserver. And liquid courage.

We start with remains in the lab! Exciting!
Hey, Cam makes a Humpty Dumpty joke about the remains and Brennan doesn’t even flinch! Way to go, Show.
Aw, Cam tells Brennan to go home since there’s nothing for her to do for a few hours yet.
AWW, Brennan is going to pick up Christine and read her Humpty Dumpty before going to bed! My baby loves her baby.
Speak of the devil! You know, the kid playing Christine could be the Gerber Baby.
(I love getting domestic snippets like this — Brennan got home early and hung out with Christine, they all had a family dinner, and are just cleaning up and unwinding.)
Booth wants to rent a cabin and go fishing! AW!
Sidebar: I saw nothing wrong with Booth’s idea. Maybe it’s just because my family’s more outdoorsy than others, but most of my relatives and family friends own or rent cabins, from one-room shacks with no indoor plumbing to three-bedrooms-and-a-furnace cottages, and have been taking their kids there since they were infants. (Seriously: I remember going to my aunt and uncle’s cabin when my cousin was six weeks old. Another cousin was a toddler at the time, too.) So I thought Booth’s suggestion was completely valid as a family outing. (It’s not like fishing is the only thing to do at a lake, after all.)
Plus, I’m pretending this is a callback to Baby in the Bough.
Ruh roh. Brennan ixnays it on the spot. She says Christine would be more comfortable at home than in new digs.
OK, here is me theorizing/fanwanking: the second I saw this, I thought this was a callback to Brennan’s Summer of Lawbreaking. Ever since last season’s finale, I thought, “you know what, if I had to spend three months on the run, fearing for my life and never able to stay in one place for too long, missing my home, the last thing I’d ever want to do is go on a family road trip or spend an extended amount of time away from home.” I’m sure I’m reaching, here, because the show doesn’t often touch upon these things, but I’m pretending, at least, that Brennan’s hesitancy to go anywhere other than home is some sort of (subconscious?) knee-jerk reaction stemming from that. Like, having to stay somewhere that is not her own home brings up the same fears she’s had since last summer, which is why she shuts it down.
I’m not saying I’m right. I know I’m probably not. But it’s what my brain came up with, and dammit, that’s what I’m going with.
Especially because last year, she had no problem going on vacation with her family in Suit on the Set (even though it was work-related), and loved taking Christine to the beach, even though she was even younger then and wouldn’t remember a damn thing. (I know, I know, different writers, different stories, etc. Humour me.)
WHOA, how is Christine 14 months old?! Man, time flies. Wasn’t she, like, nine months old in Archeologist in the Cocoon a few weeks ago? Bones time is magic!
I totally get why they aged her, though. The baby playing Christine is clearly older than nine months, and I bet they wanted to match up Christine’s age with her own, since it’s a lot harder to hide that discrepancy in babies than it is in older kids.
HOLY SHIT. Booth just flew off the handle in two seconds flat. I mean, “what is it with you?!” Jesus, man. That’s harsh.
“I don’t want to fight in front of Christine.” “Why? She won’t be able to access her memory, huh?” OH SNAP. Booth, I agree with you completely on this subject, but HOLY SHIT YOU’RE BEING AN ASSHOLE.
“Why are you so afraid to be spontaneous? Do you want Christine to grow up like that?” GOOD GOD, MAN. Way to hit below the belt!
The thing is, I get where Booth is coming from, but it’s not like he doesn’t know the way Brennan thinks, either. I understand that he’s frustrated, but this is a retread of every argument they’ve ever had, really. He knows yelling like this isn’t going to help. I get that this is natural and sometimes you just blow up at your partner when you’re frustrated, and it can’t be easy to live with Brennan sometimes, but I wanted to slap him upside the head just the same.
RUH ROH. Brennan, predictably, takes that to mean that she’s a bad mother. That is totally one of Brennan’s triggers, and Booth just unintentionally pressed that button.
HOLY SHIT. When Brennan pushes back at him? She totally looks and acts like she’s 15, right then. I have to believe that’s on purpose. I mean, she’s acting every inch the petulant teenager in this. (Plus, they straightened her hair, instead of curling the ends like they’ve been doing this season. More like the teenage Brennan we’ve seen in the past.)
Booth, maybe Brennan is misunderstanding you BECAUSE YOU WON’T STOP YELLING.
So, to sum up: Booth told Brennan she’s a party pooper, and she told him to go to hell.
I totally thought she was going to give him the finger when she walked out the door. Because I’m 12.
That baby sure is cute, though. Maybe she thinks this is performance art, which is why she’s so riveted. (Heh, she has food stuck on her cheek.)
HA, I love how Christine just looks at Booth all, “way to go, jackass. Who’s going to read me the Journal of Forensic Anthropology now, huh?” (LOL, she also looks like she’s about the share her plate of food with him, too.)
Here’s the thing: I think the fight felt natural, if removed from the context, but it was still a plot device, if that makes sense? In the sense that it escalated out of nowhere. I get that Booth was already frustrated, but like I said, he went from annoyed to shouting at the drop of a hat. But, I realize they needed a reason for Brennan to go to the lab at night, and for her to be thinking about being a mother, etc. I just don’t quite buy the fight in this episode — I wished there’d either been more buildup to the issue (i.e. Booth’s irritation), or that it had been about another topic, or something. I don’t know, I can’t quite put my finger on it.
Uh oh, Brennan’s muttering to herself about civilization and rationality and “foolish emotions.” This is how she fumes and festers. (Very reminiscent ofDoctor in the Photo.) How old-school of you, Brennan.
Speaking of Doctor, it’s a friendly night guard! Hold that thought.
Clearly, he’s evil, though. Because he does not bring Brennan cookies. Micah would have brought her cookies.
“With that, I will go resume my important duties and get a hitman to come after you!” Oops, spoiler alert.
(Just when I was starting to think, aw, all the staff loves Brennan and takes care of her. NOT.)
BRENNAN WORKING WITH THE BONES MUSICAL MONTAGE! DRINK!
Ooh, Brennan’s got that fancy new Blackberry.
Which she is using to ignore Booth’s calls. HARSH. But fair. I think they both need time and space. (Except, that’s not going to work out so well for them.)
OH FUCK ME!
SOMEONE SHOOTS BRENNAN!
I swear I thought it was Javier Bardem using that cattle gun from No Country for Old Men. (That movie traumatized me, by the way.)
OH NO. Poor Brennan!
Um, Booth, don’t you have a live-in babysitter named Sweets to take care of Christine? It’s past her bedtime.
(Heh, she’s not even wearing shoes in her stroller. Either Booth left in a hurry, or Christine kicked them off in protest.)
Aw, Booth misses her. Christine misses her. Buddy, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet.
Like right now.
It’s the Puppy Pad! AGAIN! I guess if they can soak up dog pee, they can soak up blood? I dunno.
Dude, that’s a lot of very fake sticky corn syrup blood on the floor. Heh.
AWW, Christine starts wailing. Except, every time she cries on screen, I wonder what the director had to do to that poor baby to get her to scream. The kid’s gonna have a complex about leaving her (real) parents when she grows up.
Well, this is weird.
Brennan passes in and out of consciousness, and ends up in a house.
A wonderfully and terribly ‘90s house.
Where someone is waiting for her!
And that someone is HER MOTHER.
OH SNAP.
Well, there’s a pickle.
BONES YOU GOTTA FIGHT! I know I’m supposed to feel pained for Booth in the hospital, but it makes me laugh just the same. I’m an asshole.
We’re back to dreamland as Brennan goes in and out of consciousness again!
Heh, Brennan knows she’s hallucinating due to trauma. (I’m totally going with this too, by the way, and you can’t make me think otherwise.)
Well, this version of Mrs. Brennan looks nothing like the version in Stargazer in a Puddle, but looks enough like the one in flashbacks in season 1, and the various photos we’ve seen over the years. This brown-eyed version even makes it possible for Russ to be the child of both Ruth and Max Keenan, so, good?
Um, Mrs. Brennan, not everybody thinks they’re in Heaven after a trauma. Just saying. (HEY PLOT DEVICE IN CASE YOU DIDN’T GET THE MEMO THIS IS TONIGHT’S THEME.)
Um, Mrs. Brennan, if your daughter is hallucinating, she could very well be thinking she’s speaking with you, and not because she’s in Heaven. Because THAT IS THE POINT OF A HALLUCINATION. YOU SEE THINGS THAT AREN’T THERE. That’s right, I read The Little Prince.
Sidebar: the phenomenon Brennan is talking about, with the brain trying to make sense of what’s happening? That’s always kind of fascinated me, along with freaking me out.
(Basically, scientists say the phenomenon of your life flashing before your eyes, or similar experiences, when you’re near death or under similar trauma, is your brain trying to come up with an analogous experience in your memory to relate to, so that it can come up with the appropriate response. So it flashes through your memory like a rolodex to find an experience in your past similar to it to say “AH HA! This is how we got through this!” Except most of the time, when you’re near death like that, you’re not likely to have ever experienced anything similar, so your brain keeps going through your memory like it’s going off the rails to find something. Man, brains are cool.)
So, that’s the first thing I thought of when they started teasing this episode and Brennan’s experience with her mother. (Because her parents leaving was probably the most traumatic experience she’s ever gone through, so it wouldn’t surprise me that her brain would zero in on that moment after being shot.)
Carrying on.
Except: I’m sorry. I think my residual irritation with Brennan’s mom stems from the fact that the first time I saw her on screen, I thought she looked like Minka Kelly as Lyla Garrity on Friday Night Lights, and I intensely disliked Lyla Garrity.
(Also, because I think some of her dialogue was irritating.)
MOVING ON.
Aw, nice touch, Show, with all the dolphin figurines lying around. Brennan wasn’t kidding.
HA. That “horrible” floral-print couch is so late 80s/early 90s it hurts.
It is also reason #1 why you don’t let children pick out major pieces of household furniture, Mrs. Brennan. You’re lucky you didn’t end up with a couch covered in kittens and bedazzled up the wazoo.
(Aw, Brennan loved flowers as a kid.)
Pretty sure we owned the same TV. And VCR. And lamps. Nice touch, set decorators.
“I guess I’ve changed.” “You most certainly have.” Yes, you have, sweetie. Sigh. (Totally pretending this is Brennan’s brain coming to this conclusion etc.)
(Sorry, now that I hear “Lyla Garrity,” I can’t un-hear or un-see her.)
LOL, Brennan’s answer to her mom when she asks about her life now made me laugh, because that was my argument too. “If you’re really in heaven, then you’d know, wouldn’t you?”
Hey, Brennan’s mom is wearing a chunky necklace, just like her daughter has been known to wear! Then again, that’s not a surprise, given that Brennan’s season 1 style was eerily similar to what her mom was wearing in the video inStargazer in a Puddle.
“I’m with a man. I have a daughter.” AWW. Sniff. Brennan says both those things so tenderly. She loves them.
What struck me about this scene when I initially watched was that the very first things she tells her mother are about her personal life — that she has a family of her own now. She used to define herself by her work, but now, she has other roles she’s proud of, and would want her mother to know about. It’s such a stark contrast to Woman in Limbo (which, fortuitously, was a rerun on this week), where the first thing Brennan defines herself as when confronted about her identity in the barn is a forensic anthropologist and her duties at the Jeffersonian. It’s not that one is better than the other, but she’s got so many other things in her life now, and her priorities have shifted. She knows who she is.
(Plus, if you were talking to your dead mother, you’d probably focus on the family stuff, too.)
Now that I think about it, she didn’t mention work at all in her dreams. Which further proves to me that this whole experience was about her confronting some of her Mommy Issues, both about her mother, and about being a mother. Ahem.
I think it’s so sweet how Brennan tells her mom that she named her daughter after her — you can see how important it is to Brennan.
“I love them both very much. I have to get back to them.” Oh, SWEETIE. There is so much tenderness and love in those lines. There is no doubt what is most important to Brennan now.
It’s really funny: when Brennan’s mom says that going back “isn’t [Brennan’s] decision,” the whole notion of God never even crossed my mind. What I thought was, obviously Brennan can’t make that decision — it’s up to her surgeons to fix her and to her body to fight back from the injury. Her mind can’t fix her own bullet wound and internal trauma.
“You are still the most stubborn creature on God’s green earth!” OH HEY IN CASE YOU DIDN’T GET THE MEMO WE’RE TALKING ABOUT GOD IN THIS EPISODE!
Oh what the fuck: DRINK!
“I do NOT. BELIEVE. IN GOD.” DRINK! DRINK! DRINK! (I’d be annoyed too if I were Brennan, and my subconscious and/or dead mother was picking this particular moment to lecture me on my religious beliefs.)
Still, I like seeing that Brennan was always a stubborn pain in the ass.
Oh God.
I’m such an asshole.
But this stupid shot of Brennan opening the door into the abyss made me laugh.
A lot.
Come on, Show.
I love you.
But you’re better than that.
And then when Brennan launches herself into the abyss?
COME THE FUCK ON.
That shit is hysterical.
I think I understand where they were going with this, but unfortunately I think it gets lost in the cheesetastic visuals, here.
LMAO IT’S THE ADVENTURES OF BRENNAN IN SPACE!
I’m sorry.
It’s SO bad.
Well, they sure have Brennan split wide open on that operating table, don’t they?
They’re spilling her guts, like she’s spilling her guts to her mom! GET IT? I amuse myself sometimes.
Oh hey Cam, totally inappropriately hanging out in the OR with actual surgeons!
(I’m pretending Cam was there to take custody of the retrieved bullet.)
This is the most sterile-looking OR I’ve ever seen on TV. It’s just four drywall walls and some equipment. OH IT’S WHITE JUST LIKE BRENNAN’S DOOR. Or something. I don’t know.
BRENNAN’S IN V-TACH!
OH NO!
CLEAR!
Seriously, though, poor Brennan.
Hey, she’s shocked right back into Mom Land!
SHUT UP LYLA GARRITY.
Sorry. I already had a bit of an… indifference, I guess, towards this version of Brennan’s mom, but now I’m unfairly saddling her with my previous irrational dislikes.
Aw, Brennan’s got new duds in Mom Land — except, they’re old duds. Her old duds, to be precise. In fact, it’s the very sweater she was wearing the day her mom left and never came home.
Actually, between the baggy sweater, oversized shirt, dark jeans and black sneakers, I’d say they have the early 90s teen look down pat.
This is what I’m saying, though: Brennan’s going back to the day her life irrevocably changed.
LMAO, this is awful, but the look Brennan gives her mom when she asks about Max cracks me up. She’s like “are you fucking kidding me, lady? I have a family to get back to, I have no time for your bullshit.” Oops. I may be projecting.
UUUUUUGH.
OK.
This exchange kind of gave me ragey feelings.
When Brennan says she has to go, she has a daughter to go home to, her mom answers “I know. I had to leave my daughter once, too. I’m pretty sure it killed me.” (HAHAHA IT LITERALLY DID!) THESE ARE NOT THE SAME SITUATIONS AT ALL. I’m sorry, but NO. This is one thing I’m never going to sympathize with, for either of Brennan’s parents: abandoning their kids. Yes, it was a terrible situation Max and Ruth/Christine were facing, but they chose to leave their kids. Yes, it was for their safety, and it had to have eaten them up inside. BUT THEY CHOSE TO. They had to go on the run BECAUSE OF THEIR OWN MISTAKES. They chose a life of crime, and sure they may have gone on the straight and narrow for their kids’ sake, but their pasts caught up to them. They were still robbing banks when their kids were young — so they already placed their kids in danger back then, especially once they took up with old Bill Scully the Pig Farmer. Brennan didn’t choose to leave Christine — she was fucking SHOT. In fact, when she faced the same decision as her mother, she took her child. So UGH, this just struck a nerve with me. I know the writers probably didn’t mean it that way, but it came across to me like Christine Senior was trying to play the sympathy card, and it irked me. I actually yelled at my TV.
… But here’s where I think Brennan’s subconscious comes into play. Because instead of talking about this, all she does is tell her mother, genuinely, that she and Russ understood why their mom left, which has been Brennan’s MO when it comes to her mom for the entire series. Yet, she punishes Max for the same decision, over and over again. (I’m not faulting her for it — I actually agree with her.) Brennan’s always idealized her mom and put her on a pedestal, even though she’s as responsible for her abandonment as Max is (if not more so, if Stargazer in a Puddle is to be believed). So, it doesn’t surprise me that in her “vision” here, she brushes that off as well and tries to hold true to her reverence of her mother.
Also: HEY EVERYBODY REMEMBER RUSS? That deserves a DRINK! I’m pretty sure that’s the first time they’ve mentioned him by name since season 5. (I wish they’d made another off-hand mention of him in the episode like they did inAliens in a Spaceship, with Max saying he’d just gotten off the phone with him when coming into Brennan’s room or something.)
“No, see, this is your one small problem. You think you can understand things that are simply not understandable. They throw you for a loop.” I admit that the first time around, this line bugged me, because I thought it was more of the HEY LOOK BRENNAN THERE’S AN AFTERLIFE YOU MUST BELIEVE! rhetoric. Especially since we know there are things that Brennan doesn’t know the answers to and openly acknowledges — like that speech in season 5 about maintaining her faith in the way the world works despite the unexplainable because “sugar tastes sweet, the sun comes up again” etc. So why the rerun?
But now, I think it’s a pretty good metaphor for Brennan’s character. As we’ve seen her in the past eight years, she’s always tried to make sense of the world, even that which she struggles with — namely, her emotions. Take love, for instance: she hid herself from it after losing her parents, and she couldn’t understand those feelings herself as she grew up. So, she wrapped it up in reason, as Avalon Harmonia said. It wasn’t love, it was dopamine and norepinephrine — simple explanation, right? Except, as she later learned, it wasn’t — she couldn’t reduce love to a basic explanation, because there isn’t one. Falling in love with Booth, for instance, certainly did throw her for a loop. And we all saw the pain and struggle she went through with that (ahem 100^th episode and season 6). She did eventually give in to those feelings, even if she didn’t quite understand whyshe felt that way. She just realized that whatever the reasons were, she wanted that experience in her life.
Frankly, the more I think of it, the more I would like to believe that Brennan’s mom is saying that Brennan’s always tried to put a rational spin on what she struggles with, because they confound her. Or, rather, that’s what Brennan’s saying about herself. I DON’T KNOW. I am rambling.
Dammit, I really thought we were going to get an “I don’t know what that means” when Brennan repeated “throw me for a loop,” because she certainly had that expression on her face.
OH HEY THE LOOP IS THROWING HER RIGHT BACK DOWN TO EARTH.
Aw, poor Booth is so worried in the waiting room. Of course he is, why wouldn’t he be?
Oh man, that breath he lets out as soon as Cam tells him Brennan’s stable? Poor baby. He’s got the lost little boy look on his face.
BOOTH AND CAM HUG!!!
No seriously.
THIS IS A MOMENTOUS OCCASION.
I’ve missed their friendship, so much.
Oh man, Cam’s voice breaking when she tells him Brennan’s heart stopped, twice? She sounds so scared, too. Shit got real, fast.
IT’S A MIRACLE! BECAUSE IN CASE YOUR MAIL CARRIER LOST YOUR MEMO, THIS IS THE THEME OF TONIGHT’S EPISODE. AGAIN.
Um, Booth, not to begrudge your faith, because it’s entirely honourable, but there is another explanation for Brennan surviving. It’s called medical intervention. Just saying.
Aw, Cam’s face, though? So sweet. You know Booth’s steadfast faith is one of the things she admires about him.
Cam’s so upset that Hal The Cookieless Security Guard is dead! Man, there’s a whole life to the Jeffersonian we never get to see.
I have to say, I really do like them discussing the case in the midst of all this. I assumed this would be how they’d handle it — that Booth would immediately jump into it and start figuring out theories right away, since he’s a man of action, after all. Cam’s reminder to him that his place was here, with Brennan, was sweet, though — as was his reassurance that he knew that. I’ll take ManOfAction!Booth over Weepy!Booth any day.
You guys, they’re such good friends when they want to be.
LOL, there’s the fake blood again. I wonder if they got it from a Halloween decoration shop?
CLARK!
CLARK!
Where are your binders, Clark?
I guess he left in a hurry and forgot them.
Aw, he volunteered his services as soon as he heard about Brennan’s attack.
“This could be dangerous.” “Yeah well, my middle name is Danger.” BWAH! I love you, Clark. Eugene Byrd is so awesome. “—It’s actually Thomas.” “Thomas. His name is Thomas Edison.” BWAHAHAHA. I love you, Show. Sweets’/John Francis Daley’s deadpan delivery was perfect.
THOMAS EDISON.
CLARK THOMAS EDISON.
This show can be pretty perfect when it wants to be.
At first I was thinking they were trying to cast suspicion on Clark, but then I figured they were just surprised Clark would volunteer himself for such a serious crime case.
Um, Brennan looks way prettier after her heart stopping and coming right out of major surgery than I could ever hope to be on my best day.
I can’t figure out what Brennan’s muttering before she wakes up. “I have to go back” maybe?
It always amuses me when people on TV tell people who’ve just woken up from anesthesia to “just relax.” Um, if I woke up in a hospital after being shot, I’d be pretty fucking confused too.
“I had a dream. It felt so real. I didn’t understand.” Sorry, the parallels amuse me. I snark so I don’t cry.
Actually I see a lot of parallels between Brennan’s “visions” in this episode, and Booth’s coma dream in End in the Beginning, but that is saved for the Thoughts and Feelings portion of this recap at the very end.
Aww, Booth kissed her hand. How very Mulder of him.
For some reason Booth glancing down to Brennan’s stomach when she says she was cold at the wound site makes me laugh. BRENNAN’S STOMACH IS MAGIC. Well, that’s what his face says.
Aw, Max went to get his pseudo-son-in-law some coffee. That’s better than a kick in the nuts.
Goddammit, Max. You don’t have to tell your daughter THE SECOND SHE WAKES UP FROM SURGERY that she “flatlined,” twice. She’s all drugged up and shit, let her get her bearings.
… Which is basically what Booth tells him.
Aw, Brennan just wants to know where Christine (Junior) is. Jesus, this is going to get confusing. Brennan, did you really have to name your daughter after your mother and then have some sort of alternate reality experience with the latter? It confuses matters.
Christine is in daycare! Apparently, the Jeffersonian daycare is open 24/7. It’s like McDonald’s! Man, Brennan really did luck out on childcare arrangements.
Aw, Max is going to go pick the baby up when he’s done there. They’ve got lock-picking lessons to catch up on.
Brennan’s Sad Face when Booth tells her Hal the Cookieless Security Guard was killed to is cute, which is probably the wrong thing to say. Brennan’s probably sad no one else will be able to find her cookies now.
THERE’S NO BULLET! THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE! IT MUST BE A MIRACLE! Sorry. The Snark, it must be released.
LOL, why did Brennan try to get up? Was she going to start examining herself to find the bullet? Wait, she totally was, wasn’t she? Oh, Brennan.
“Two minutes. You were dead for two minutes.” CHRIST ON A CRACKER BOOTH DO WE NEED TO GO OVER THIS? Brennan was not dead. I’m sorry guys, but NO. There’s more to medical and legal death than your heart stopping beating. She was in cardiac arrest. NOT THE SAME THING. (If that equalled death, I’d have a hell of a lot of relatives who would be “undead” now.) Booth, you’ve been trawling Tumblr for too long. It’s time to clear your head for awhile.
CATWALK! THE LAB CATWALK! DRINK!!!
I’ve missed it so.
Strangely, none of the squints are the ones using it. Today, it’s Sweets and Agent Disney Channel, walking and talking.
IT’S HER INVESTIGATION LANCE. Someone’s still got her shorts in a knot a wee bit where jurisdiction is concerned.
Well, Hal is sure gross, all opened up. Thanks, Show.
You know, I’d expect Angela to be a lot more freaked out right now.
“When you eliminate the possible, you are left with the truth, no matter how improbable.” Show, stop fucking with me and trying to use your logic on me and me theories for this episode. I DON’T WANT TO ELIMINATE MY POSSIBLE GODDAMMIT AND YOU CAN’T MAKE ME.
OOOH, an ice bullet? Really? I heard they did something like this onMythbusters. (And that their experiment worked as well as Hodgins’ does later on.)
Oh look, it’s a montage of squints talking about the squinty things they were doing at the Jeffersonian last night! I like that they’re from different departments. Man, those guys in art restoration are sure competitive. (Wasn’t that where the murder was in Intern in the Incinerator? Which this episode reminded me of.)
Oh hey, It’s That Guy! I’m talking about Sir Cecil Asquith Britishfellow (™ backshootingford). HE DID IT. Because he always plays the smarmy guy in any show he’s in.
Of course Sir Cecil Asquith Britishfellow listens to classical music on his headphones. Because he’s British. He was probably drinking tea and eating crumpets while singing God Save The Queen at the same time.
LOL, at first I thought the dude talking about staring at the girl with the tight skirt was talking about Brennan, and I was like, dude, not that I blame you, but you’re skeevy. Turns out he was talking about the other chick. Which is still skeevy.
HAL TRIPPED AND FIRED HIS TASER INTO THE FLOOR. Oh, Sir Cecil Asquith Britishfellow, how devious of you, explaining why his taser’s confetti could be found on the floor later.
“I’m usually objective…” LOL GOOD ONE SWEETS.
OOOH, Agent Disney Channel is “just being a friend.” They’re friends now, huh?
27 people working on this case? Dayum. (I actually don’t know if that’s a lot, but it sounds like a lot.)
Oh here we go, obligatory “We Had A Fight Before The Shooting” guilt trip. Except, mercifully, it wasn’t much of a guilt trip. I feared they were going to have Booth blame himself for Brennan’s attack, but I liked that here, while it clearly bugged him, he also realized the fight happened because she misunderstood him, not because he did something wrong. (Though, she misunderstood because he approached it badly, but whatever.) Our Booth is growing up.
Aw, Sweets realizes what’s really wrong here is that they don’t know what happened to Brennan, and the best way to fix that is to figure it out. Good on ya, Baby Duck.
Tasers can cause ventricular fibrillation! Yeah, just ask the RCMP officers at YVR. (Oops. Too dark?)
Hal killed the first victim? Maybe he tripped and tasered him to death.
“Johannes Groot. What is that, Dutch?” “I don’t see any wooden shoes.” Good zinger, Agent Disney!
(Wasn’t Pelant’s first vicim in Crack in the Code Dutch? Or was she Danish? I forget.)
“What’s up your butt?” Seriously, you two are 12 years old. I’m glad Sweets found someone his own age to play with when Mama and Papa Duck aren’t around.
LOL, Sweets is such a girl with his Clock Logic Vortex.
OK, this scene completely went over my head the first time, which shows how much attention I paid to these two jokers. I did not register at ALL that they’d slept together. Sweets started talking and I thought he meant their kiss in Gunk in the Garage, then I apparently tuned out Agent Disney completely because I didn’t notice AT ALL that she talked about them going out on a few dates and sleeping together once, which “lacked fireworks.” (Ouch.)
Well, good for you two kids for being so adult about it, then.
(I find it interesting how Show handles relationships — they seem to be big on the friends-after-breakup route, or not-every-hookup-turns-into-a-relationship route. It’s refreshing, in some ways.)
Also: bet those lack of fireworks didn’t happen on the Wolverine sheets. Heh.
“Normally, I’m quite good in bed…” LOL how I missed this, I don’t know, because it cracks me up now.
Sweets, word of advice? Don’t talk about your sex life with your ex while chatting up your current crush.
Not that I’m putting too much stock in Agent Disney, but when she said “I know how you feel,” are we supposed to take that as her also just getting out of a long-term relationship? And that’s why they lacked sparks? Who knows.
Agent Disney is reminding me a lot of Agent Perotta. Must be the hair.
OK, so, I don’t really care one way or the other if Sweets and Disney hook up again, but I wouldn’t mind seeing them as friends. (Well, “seeing” as in Sweets mentioning her once in awhile to know she exists, but not having to see her on screen.) Because they seem to like each other and he needs more friends his own age who aren’t irritating as fuck.
CONFETTI! WITH NUMBERS ON IT! For the OCD raver in us all. Or something.
AW! Angela visiting Brennan at the hospital!
Is it just me, or is Brennan repeating everything we’ve just learned in the past 20 minutes? It’s OK, she’s on drugs and is about to have another heart attack or what the fuck ever, she’s allowed. (Oops, spoiler alert.)
Angela, of course Brennan knew tasers released tracking number confetti. She knows everything, after all.
SPEAKING OF HEARTS GIVING OUT!
Show, you’re so fucking subtle.
Not.
My (non-)professional, medical opinion about what’s wrong with Brennan? BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP. (Gold star to whoever gets the reference.)
I’m sorry, Brennan’s stoner “I feel wonderful!” before collapsing made me laugh, because I’m the worst.
On a more serious note: BRENNAN QUIT DOING THAT.
Aaaaand we’re back to Mom Land.
Oh no big deal, Real!Brennan’s heart may have peaced out, but Dream!Brennan’s just having a cuppa with her mom on their hideous couch, shooting the breeze.
“Do you remember the last time we saw each other?” OF COURSE SHE DOES. It’s not like it was the singular most traumatic experience of her life at that point.
“Of course. I was 15. I went to bed. And I never saw you again. But I survived.” Oh,sweetie. The matter-of-fact way she says that last part — that’s the Brennan we’ve seen over the years, pushing away her pain to get through the day.
Brennan and her mom had a fight the night before her parents disappeared? Of course they did.
I’m actually not being snarky at all here.
I said this on Monday night, but for some reason, I always got the feeling that Brennan and her mom had some sort of relatively meaningless squabble just before her parents disappeared, and that’s one of the reasons maybe that Brennan now idealizes her mother. Which is stupid, because I know back in season 1, the writers hadn’t planned that far ahead, so it was just conjecture on my part when watching those episodes. I think it’s just something in how Brennan said in Woman in Limbo that she and her mom had a fight over the dolphin belt on her first day of high school that led me to believe that they’d had a number of those teenage clashes, as parents and children are wont to do, and I got the impression that something similar may have happened shortly before Max/Matthew and Ruth/Christine left.
So let’s get back to the scene.
Brennan and Christine Senior (Damn this is getting confusing) had a fight over a boy. Ooh la la.
I sure hope this Scott Morrison was less creepy than Andy Pflueger turned out to be. (Then again, based on what comes next, probably not.)
I also think this is a pretty good callback to that episode where Brennan talks about how she had a crush on a boy (was it Andy Pflueger? I forget), and how he gave her Brainy Smurf instead of Smurfette, and how she was so humiliated the only person she told the story to was her mother. It was probably unintentional, but it fits with the history we already knew of her character. So, Brennan may be “different,” and may have been a social misfit, but that doesn’t mean she couldn’t still experience crushes and have teenage angst like other kids — even if it processed and manifested itself differently in her.
Whoops, tangent, I’m sorry.
Brennan changed her clothes and started smoking cigarettes because of this boy? OH MY GOD. Well, that’s certainly unexpected.
Only, not. I can totally buy it. We don’t even know if this Scott guy knew Brennan. For all we know, she tried to change herself to be more like him (or the cool kids) in an attempt to fit in. Or hell, maybe she did talk to this guy. Either way, I still don’t think it contradicts the past information we’ve had that Brennan was a loner or nerd or awkward or even that she literally has difficulty processing her emotions or the world around her. I see it as an attempt by a shy, awkward girl to somehow be like someone else, to make that connection, but not quite knowing how, so she goes for the “obvious.” (It’s like how she would “study” Booth in early seasons.)
Brennan didn’t know that her mom knew about the cigarettes. Which I pretend supports my delusion about all this being Brennan’s subconscious. Which is why her mom can know pretty much anything Brennan knows. AHEM. (Shut up, I know about “Mom Radar” and everything. I. Don’t. Care.)
Seriously, Brennan does look like she’s back to being 15 right here.
“And I told you that you were too dreamy and emotional. Making decisions on what you felt, instead of using your brain.” Wow, file this under Things No One Has Ever Accused Brennan Of Ever.
The thing is, though, is that once more, I buy it, completely. We’ve always known that Brennan feels things, deeply, it’s just seemingly the demonstration or understanding of it that is difficult to process for her. So I have no doubt that applied to a teenage crush as well. Brennan was probably always overly literal and rational (and I think Max and Russ have both alluded to that in the past), but I can see how teenage Brennan would be overwhelmed by her feelings, and acting out on/because of them (perhaps in inappropriate ways). Because she hadn’t yet learned that what she felt was “bad.” (Which happened after her family disappeared.) And it’s not like we haven’t seen evidence of Brennan’s “dreaminess” before: the fact that she was able to write such successful novels, packed with romance, are grown-up proof of that. (Yes, I know she credits Angela with it — but Brennan is the one who had to write it all.) I understand it’s a bit of a leap, but someone who’s able to write popular fiction like that has to have experience living inside her head — and I think being starry-eyed over teenage crushes or pastimes is evidence of that. Hell, I think the coma dream book is the ultimate proof of Brennan’s “dreamy and emotional” side at play, in spite of her rational self.
Again, that statement kind of tapped into my own “head canon” about Brennan’s past. Like I’ve said, I think Brennan was probably born “different” — I don’t think she was lying all these years when she said she doesn’t understand what she feels, or what others feel, sometimes. But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t feel at all. I’ve felt since watching from the beginning that Brennan was probably always shy, awkward and socially “maladjusted” to her peers, and had trouble relating to them for a variety of reasons — being so much smarter than them, inherent processing troubles, etc. But, the impression I’ve always had of her family life as a child was that home was where she was the most comfortable, and she acted much differently with there than she did with anyone else. She could be relatively “normal” with her family (even though that term is problematic), because they accepted her for who she was and loved her unconditionally, and never made her feel as though something was wrong with her. She didn’t have the stress of not being understood, or not understanding those around her, when she was with her family, which allowed her to be herself. So, she could easily be a petulant, obstinate teenage girl at home with her mother, because that was where she was safest and she knew her mother would never judge her for it.
(It’s why I’ve felt there’s been such a contrast to Public vs. Private Brennan in seasons 7 and 8. I feel like Brennan at home with Booth, where she is the most comfortable, kind of channels this “peaceful” version of herself, whereas outside of their home she’s still got her at times hyper-rational defences up to protect herself.)
I really don’t think we’re supposed to take this as meaning Brennan was completely normal until her family disappeared. I still don’t believe she was, but more to the point, this episode doesn’t contradict that previous “version” of Brennan we’ve been given, in my eyes at least. I think the ideas can coexist. I sincerely doubt we’re to believe Brennan was part of the popular crew, hanging with the cool kids at lunch and watching Saved by the Bell with a bunch of girlfriends while gossiping about boys, and suddenly turned into a hyper-rational book nerd the second her parents left. But, I do think what we’re supposed to take from this is that the relatively emotionally closed-off individual we met in the Pilot wasn’t always so dismissive of her emotions. (Again, this is not saying that Pilot!Brennan didn’t have emotions — she most certainly did — but we saw how she often fought to deny herself the importance of her emotions or feelings.)
Whew. Sorry. Sidebars, they are a-plenty tonight.
Oh my gosh, when Christine Senior taps Brennan’s forehead, and Brennan tears up and goes, “you did that [the night they fought]” and her mom tells us that Brennan slapped her had away? THE FEELINGS. Oh, Brennan. This part of the scene is a master class of acting by Emily Deschanel, folks. It’s just raw, unfiltered emotion from Brennan. From happiness at remembering her mom, to sadness about that being the last time they spoke, to regret at having slapped her mom’s hand away — she’s just so vulnerable, and you can see the 15 year old in her coming out again.
OH MY GOD. Brennan’s “I loved you so much” to her mother absolutely slays me. Because you know that’s what Brennan’s been wanting to say to her mother for over 20 years. That’s what it all comes down to — you want your loved ones to know how much they meant to you.
Christine Senior’s “Honey, I knew that” does me in, too. Because all this time, that’s probably exactly the reassurance Brennan’s needed. Adult!Brennan must know that, deep down, but Teenage!Brennan is still scared her mom thought she hated her for calling her out on her behaviour with a boy.
(This is reminding me so much of the barn scene of Woman in Limbo, both in emotion and just in how young Brennan looks.)
I also think it’s really interesting how Brennan tells her mom that she hates that the last thing she did was slap away her hand — because right after she says that, you can kind of see her steeling herself, like she’s trying to snap out of her pity party or whatever. Which is funny, because whether this is Brennan’s imagination or an actual visit from beyond the grave, it’s her experience, and she can do whatever she damn well pleases. But, she’s still almost chastising herself, and fighting herself. Oh, Brennan.
“It’s alright, Temperance.” “How do you know?” I find this a really interesting exchange, and I can’t quite explain why. Is it that Brennan doesn’t understand how her mom can be so forgiving? I think maybe it’s Brennan asking herself that.
“I think maybe that’s why you took my advice, and you never changed yourself for another person ever again. So you’d never be hurt. You tucked your heart away, and you used your brain.” I really liked this line, because I think that’s exactly what we’ve seen over the past eight seasons, and what the writers have been trying to tell us. At 15, scared and alone, Brennan decided not to let herself feel like that, because losing that love was completely and utterly devastating. The emotional stuff may have been difficult enough as it was for her, but without the safety of her family, there was no use in even trying to understand them. It’s why she was so reluctant to get close to anyone, and never gave herself until Angela and Booth came along, because they made the effort to get past those walls she erected.
Again, I think we’ve seen plenty of evidence of this — in the few relationships we’ve seen Brennan in, she’s been steadfast in remaining set in her ways. Which is not inherently a bad thing, because it’s important to stay true to yourself, but she did it to a fault in order to push away others when they got too close — like, say, Sully. And the few times we’ve gotten a glimpse of Brennan and Booth in conflict as a couple, Brennan does fall back to that: it’s what their argument over moving in together in Memories in the Shallow Grave was about, after all. And I saw the same thing in the plot device of an argument in this episode’s teaser, as well. When something scares her or pushes her buttons, she defaults back to that defence.
And here’s another thing: if Christine Senior is “real,” and says at the beginning that she doesn’t know about Brennan’s life, then how did she know that Brennan locked up her heart after that conversation with her mom? HA. SHE DIDN’T. BECAUSE THIS IS ALL BRENNAN’S DOING. Sorry. I told you I was delusional.
LMAO WHAT THE FUCK IS THE SPARKLY SHINY HUG?!
I’m sorry, I just can’t abide by the special effects in this episode. They’re SO CHEESY.
I’m also really confused as to why they chose to focus on Brennan’s mom after she “disappears” back into consciousness, or whatever. I feel like if the episode is being told from Brennan’s perspective, they should have let the last shot of that scene be on her instead. She should be the one “feeling” her mother through her, and not the other way around.
(And what the hell does it mean anyway?! I mean, I know that Brennan is going back to the “real world,” but what’s with the whole transcendent thing. Is Brennan turning into her mother? Is Brennan finally at peace with how she left her mother? Who knows.)
Also BRENNAN DISAPPEARED INTO THE ETHER.
Meanwhile, back in the real world, the two most important men in her life are smothering her! Huzzah.
(You know, if Christine Senior used to tell Max that he “threw her for a loop” all the time, chances are Brennan heard it herself sometimes. Just saying.)
Oooh, Brennan had a reaction to the antigens in her blood during surgery? Freaky.
(Um, SPOILER ALERT, if the reaction was from the bullet, as we find out later, wouldn’t she start having these reactions sooner? Like, as soon it entered her bloodstream? OR MAYBE HER HALLUCINATIONS ARE A RESULT OF HER BODY FIGHTING OFF THE ANTIGENS. HA.)
Sidebar: one of my relatives has a rare blood type, and her husband has a different one, and she had to go through all sorts of tests during her pregnancies, because if the baby had the same blood group type as her husband, she’d have to go on meds so as not to form antibodies. So this is what this plot reminded me of.
Aw, Booth is holding her hand the whole time.
How is it that Brennan, who’s just come out of cardiac arrest for the third time, is the only one with the clarity of mind to politely thank the doctor? Geez, does she have to do everyone’s job for them?
“Don’t look so worried.” Oh, Brennan. Haaaaave you met Booth? Yeah.
HA, Brennan gives Max the universal “Get out of my room, DAD” look. Very politely, of course.
“Booth, I don’t understand it. For some reason I feel like it’s you who keeps calling me back here.” On its own, I find this line incredibly touching, and revealing of just how much Brennan loves Booth. I know we’re getting into the freaky deaky shit right after this, but even if she’s just talking about coming in and out of consciousness, the fact that she thinks Booth is the reason she’s fighting back, despite the fact that it’s irrational — it’s sweet, to me. It fits right in with the “I love you and I’m willing to do irrational things to prove it” theme of the season.
… The only thing that puts a damper on this for me is the line being followed by “I went to another place.” Ugh. Sorry. I’m the one being irrational now.
(I’m still saying this “other place” is in her mind.)
Ah, there’s the Brennan we know, chalking it up to a hallucination.
Ah, there’s the Booth we know, saying maybe her mom is helping her.
(If I think about it, her “mom” is helping her work through some shit.)
HA, the look she gives him is classic Brennan.
“Look, you came back, that’s the main thing.” Aw, Booth. I love how he doesn’t challenge her on it, and lets her work through it on her own. I have some thoughts on this, which I will get to in the last scene, but it was a good contrast to another instance of this that drove me up the wall in another episode.
“You really think I could actually be seeing my mother?” Again, haaaaaaave you met Booth? Obviously, sweetie.
Aw, she squeezes his hand. Not because her heart is about to stop again, but because she just loves him.
Booth is right to freak out though, given recent history.
Aw, poor exhausted and battered Brennan just wants to sleep for awhile.
Awwwww, Booth kisses her forehead. It’s so tender and loving and what are these two doing to me? He just loves her so much, you guys.
Hodgins is going Mythbusters on us! AWESOME!
A BLOOD BULLET?!
FUCKING A.
IS THAT A REAL THING?!
That is so fucking badass.
Probably completely crazy.
BUT HOLY CRAP.
I don’t care how unrealistic it is. I’m going for it.
HEE. CAM KISSES HODGINS AND NOTHING HURTS. (I only wish it was on the lips. He deserves a little sugar.)
CLARK!
That’s all. I just love him.
EWW pus. That is never not gross.
For some reason it amuses me that as soon as he finds something shiny, he says Hodgins will have a field day, haha.
OF COURSE BRENNAN IS EXAMINING HER OWN X-RAYS. Do you expect anything less from her?
(I was actually hoping for something like that as soon as they teased this episode.)
“Honey, why don’t you relax?” Max, haaaaave you met your daughter?
“Why don’t you let Booth and the geeks at the lab take care of this?” Nice, Max. (You know, you used to be one of those geeks, once upon a plot device.)
Oh man, when I saw Max’s paper bag, I was so hoping they were snickerdoodles. That would have been a hell of a callback.
Instead, he brought ice cream. Which, apparently, is Brennan’s Achilles heel, as we’ve learned in the past year. (Um, except, er, maybe not in quite this context. Ahem.)
You guys, look how excited she is when she sees that it’s Mint Chocolate. She’s about five years old and it’s adorable.
Aw, Brennan’s mom used to get it from “Parkside Candy,” which I assume was a neighbourhood shop. That’s so sweet. Pun intended.
Wow, Max’s change in expression is intense. Deep down, he’s a broken man as well, one who misses his wife with every fibre of his being. He’s desperate for any connection to her, even if it’s through his daughter.
I also think it’s in-character that Max would believe his daughter had some sort of otherworldly experience. I mean, yes, Max was a scientist and a pragmatist, but I think there’s also a whimsical side to him.
Oh man, Ryan O’Neal and Emily Deschanel are so wonderful in this scene. It’s probably my favourite of the episode.
Take, for instance, when Max asks about his wife, and Brennan initially brushes it off as her brain reacting to the adrenaline in her system, as rational as ever. As soon as he reminds her that she was “gone” for two minutes, Brennan’s expression changes. You can see her let out a deep breath and kind of lock her jaw, like she’s losing the battle to stay rational about everything.
Brennan, again, really does look like she’s 15 again throughout this scene, especially when she tells Max that there “is no other place.” (I wish they’d feature this fresh-faced look more often. Not that she doesn’t always look beautiful, but she’s so naturally pretty that such minimal makeup here really highlights it.)
You can just feel the pain and the desperation oozing out of Max when he asks Brennan if his wife asked about him. As I’ve said, he was completely besotted with his wife, and while he may have moved on, he obviously still misses her like crazy.
What I think is SO interesting is that Brennan doesn’t try to fight him on it too. She may not believe her experience is what Max thinks it is, but she tells him, “In my dream— yes, she did. She misses you.” (Even though, as we’ve seen, Christine Senior never outright says that. Brennan’s inferring that up on her own. Since it’s her own doing.) I mean, she’s only relating what she’s experienced, but it’s also like she’s trying to comfort Max as well. It’s probably as unguarded as we’ve ever seen Brennan with her father.
(Maybe because now that she loves someone, she knows what it’s like to miss them, and have them miss you back? I dunno.)
Oh man, I don’t often feel for Max, but right here, after Brennan tells him that? I do, I really do. That’s a man who’s never gotten over losing the love of his life, or his family. (Even if that was his own doing.) In many ways, he’s a broken man. Ryan nailed it.
“We were very happy, all of us, weren’t we? I miss that so much. So much.” Sigh. I’ve said in the past that I don’t have much sympathy for either of Brennan’s parents for their situation, because it was of their own doing, but in this moment here, forgetting all the circumstances around it, I can certainly sympathize with the pure grief of losing that family. We see how much that even wrecked Brennan, but Max is often portrayed as an amiable rolling stone; we rarely get to see him so heartbroken. So, it’s incredibly touching to see both father and daughter share in the same grief for a moment, because they both lost someone, and something, they loved.
That’s just it: despite the Brennans/Keenans’ background, they were an incredibly close, solid unit. In many ways, they were the archetypal American family. (You know, minus the bank robbing and conmen and fraud etc.) Mom and Dad who loved each other, son and daughter who bickered but otherwise got along and looked out for each other, whole family who spent lots of time together and supported each other. In the blink of an eye, all of that was shot to hell. (Again, because of Mom and Dad’s own mistakes, but this isn’t about the blame game right now.) Max and Brennan can both share in that grief of what was lost.
Oh man, when Brennan makes her teary-eyed crumpling face, I want to make a crumpling face.
I don’t know that Brennan’s ever really allowed herself to grieve for the loss of her family as a teenager, and maybe it’s all coming out now?
UGH. I love the Brennan family dynamics, I really do. In case you hadn’t noticed.
As an aside, Brennan in that hospital bed reminds me so much of Man in the Morgue.
Ooh, the flecks are from close to home! The Jeffersonian basement, to be exact.
Oh fuck it, I’m gonna say it: DRINK.
Hey, it really is like Intern in the Incinerator!
Hey, everybody just shows up to the hospital now to talk about the case! This time it’s Agent Disney!
Guess Booth isn’t listening to Cam anymore. Heh.
BAM. Booth is the BAMF who can put the pieces together and figure out that the shooting and forgery was in-house! Only, that was probably obvious from the fact that the flecks of paint were from the painting stored in the basement but whatever. Agent Disney, you need to step it up.
So, apparently Booth found this information worthy enough for him to go home, shower, and get suited up. (Or maybe Brennan told him he stunk.)
Hey, BOOTH’S IN THE LAB! DRINK!
So what the fuck is this guy’s name? Dr. Batwan? I heard Dr. Batman. Which is so wrong, because he’s so not cool enough to be Dr. Batman. Because he’s Sir Cecil Asquith Britishfellow.
“I would never jeopardize a conviction, especially not this one.” LOL except for that part where you almost beat the shit out of him three minutes from now. Oops, SPOILER ALERT.
LOL, Sir Cecil is the worst criminal ever. Why the fuck would an art restorer have CRYOGENIC DEWAR on their desk?! “Paint? Check. Brush? Check. Gloves? Check. iPod featuring the soothing melodies of Duke Silver? Check. Can of Frozen Nitrogen containing blood bullets to shoot pretty doctor ladies? Check!”
(Seriously, why the fuck was he carrying around frozen blood bullets?! Is that something prevalently used in art restoration?! I didn’t get it.)
Ha, Booth, I’m pretty sure you’re fudging the “what’s yours is the Jeffersonian’s” lines, but what the fuck ever, you’re hot when you’re a cocky motherfucker, so let’s roll with it.
That’s one intense spitball machine Sir Cecil built.
“I didn’t hear a question.” HEE. I like the snarky lawyers on this show.
Oh hey Sir Cecil, is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? No? You want to kill me? OK.
LOL, he should have said he was in the bathroom with Montezuma’s Revenge. That would have explained his nine minutes.
“You two really don’t understand the concept of a question, do you?” HEE. I’m sorry, I laughed.
OH SNAP.
Booth goes apeshit on Sir Cecil for being a smirking asshole!
Unfortunately, it is lost on me.
One, because I don’t find displays of violence appealing at all. I get why some do, but it’s not my bag.
Two, because the dialogue makes me roll my eyes: “You tried to kill the woman I love? The mother of my child? Big mistake.” Look, I get the sentiment, I really do. I understand why Booth is so upset. And I realize that it’s sort of in-character for him. But that dialogue is just so cheesy to me. Especially because he just said he was going to be professional and not jeopardize his case — well, consider the case utterly jeopardized now, man.
Remember what happened the last time you beat up a guy who was threatening you partner? YOU WERE SUSPENDED AND HE FRAMED HER FOR MURDER.
So, to sum up: Booth is Mandy Patinkin in The Princess Bride. “Hello. My name is Seeleyo Boothoya. You almost killed my partner. Prepare to die.”
Uh oh, Cam just texted Booth! To say Brennan’s going into surgery AGAIN. Geez. It’s been a busy couple of days for Seeley Booth.
“… And your lawyer sucks!” LOL, Booth, what are you, 12?
Speaking of 12 year olds: “You can only hold my client if you have more questions.” “Oh, I have questions. Lots of questions.” Aaaand Agent Disney shows us why she should be on the Disney Channel!
Oh look, Brennan is being wheeled into surgery in a hallway while Booth runs along her gurney! Where have I seen that before? Show sure does love its self-referential parallels.
“Bones, what’s wrong?” “Nothing, I’m going into surgery.” LOL, I laughed at Booth, because when he said “those two things are opposite” I pretty much said the same thing.
Um, I don’t quite get the writers’ logic here. I mean, I do, but I don’t. The blood bullet left antigens on her rib? But, wouldn’t those antigens have been absorbed into her bloodstream? Because, you know, they’re in blood? I didn’t think that they could “stick” to bones.
“It’s not dangerous, is it?” “It’s 100% risk-free.” OH LOOK WHO JUST LIED HER PANTS OFF! No seriously, she’s not wearing any pants, so she totally did. Oh,Brennan. This is just like when she lied to him for his own good in Proof in the Pudding, only not, because SHE’S FUCKING GOING INTO SURGERY, not talking about a guy who’s been dead for 50 years. But, the sentiment is the same: she wants to protect Booth.
You know, I go back and forth between thinking Booth buys it, and thinking Booth just goes with it because he’d rather be in denial and appreciates that she’s trying to protect him.
Because seriously: no surgery is 100% risk-free, not if you’re going under general anesthesia. (And not if the bullet FUCKING PIERCED YOUR ABDOMEN.)
Aw, they’re back to being tender and sweet, with Booth leaning in for a kiss before she goes into the OR.
You guys, they just love each other so much. Like I said, it’s an interesting parallel to the end scene of Critic in the Cabernet, because a lot of it is similar — the setting, the handholding, the risk of the unknown, Brennan stating that everything will be fine when she has no way of knowing, even the outpouring of love between them. Yet, so much has changed too — there’s no attempt to conceal the nature of that love now, because they mean so much more to each other. There’s so much more to lose.
“I’ll be fine.” UNGH, the sweetness, it overwhelms me.
(I do kind of wish they’d exchanged quick “I love yous” here, only because they were on such a roll with the PDA here. Then again, I get the feeling that if Brennan had thrown one in here, Booth would know the jig was up about how serious the surgery actually was.)
Also, can we stop to appreciate that Temperance Brennan volunteered herself for surgery to magically retrieve these antigens to nail the motherfucker who tried to kill her? Talk about a BAMF.
The show sure is on a biopsy kick lately. This is the second— well, third— one in a month!
Um, I also have to say I laughed a lot when Booth said that Sir Cecil’s blood was in Brennan. I’m an asshole?
On a serious note: EW. Brennan’s going to have to be on antivirals and so forth for like, a year, thanks to that. As if getting shot isn’t bad enough. Because who knows what kind of shit is in Sir Cecil’s murdery blood.
(Or at least, that’s the first thing I thought of when they said it was a blood bullet. Because according to every hospital-set TV show, doctors and nurses who get nicked and come into contact with a patient’s blood has to go on those kinds of drugs in case of HIV etc. YAY TV for filling me with bullshit, or something.)
We’re back in The Most Sterile White OR In Existence. (Which is totally why BRENNAN SEES NOTHING BUT WHITE OUTSIDE OF HER COMA HOUSE.)
Oh hey Cam, you’re back!
You know who else is back? BRENNAN’S MOM.
Because we’re back in Mom Land.
So, all Brennan needs to see her mom again is a little laugh gas? Well, that makes it easy, then.
(Unless they’re implying that her heart stopped AGAIN, but no one told her afterwards. Which I don’t think is the case. IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH “DYING” OK?!)
Hey, I just noticed all the vinyl records and the turntable by the window. Aw.
Oh, Brennan. When she sees her mom packing her bag up to leave, it’s kind of like all the air gets sucked out of her for a second, because she’s back to reliving that day that never was.
“I’m just going to work, I’ll see you tonight.” Nope, you won’t. You didn’t 20 years ago, and you won’t here.
“We’re never going to see each other again.” “We will!” Or… not.
Here’s the thing: I keep looking at these conversations with her mom, particularly the last two, as Brennan’s “do-over” of her last day with her mom. From what we’re told, they fought, Brennan went to bed (presumably), then the next morning her parents left for their day, not realizing what was going to happen, and Brennan never saw them again. So, to me, this last scene is sort of like Brennan re-writing that, waking up the next morning and catching her mom before she leaves for work, which she didn’t get to do 20 years ago. Everything in this episode is what Brennan wished she could have said to her mom that morning, if she hadn’t been festering like a bratty 15 year old, with the benefit of hindsight.
(In Woman in Limbo, which was on the other day, Booth says Brennan’s parents went Christmas shopping when they disappeared. I don’t think this contradicts that, necessarily. They could have planned to go shopping after work. Really, though, I think this particular scenario is Brennan imagining what that last day could have been like if she’d gotten up to see her parents off. I’m rambling. I apologize.)
Hey, Brennan’s wearing a dolphin necklace! Aw.
“The advice I gave you back then? Use your head, be rational, don’t let your heart lead you— use your brain. That allowed you to survive. And it held true. But I have another piece of advice for you. It’s time for you to find some of that little girl that you locked away so deep inside yourself.” “Why?” “Because it’s not about surviving anymore. It’s about flourishing. It’s about living a full life.” Oh my gosh, Emily Deschanel is knocking it out of the park again with the whole saying-everything-without-saying-a-word thing, with the silent tears and open expression.
More importantly though, let’s get to this dialogue, which I’ve already talked about, but what the hell, this thing is already 20 pages long, what’s a few more?As I said the other night, this annoyed me when I first heard it, because I thought, “writers, she HAS been flourishing, for eight years now, especially the last two.” She has opened up, and she is living a full life. So I kind of got offended on Brennan’s behalf, which is stupid since SHE IS A FICTIONAL CHARACTER AND I AM CRAZY. But the more I thought about it, the more I thought it was another instance in which the writers were stating the obvious for the segment of the audience who hadn’t gotten the memo, in the same way that “you’re the father” and “I don’t want you to think Christine is the only reason we’re together” were as well. It feels, to me, like they’re trying to show us just how much she has come along, and that her journey went from surviving and getting by, in season 1, to “living wide” by season 8.
Plus, since I’m of the mind that this is mostly about Brennan’s subconscious, this is her way of acknowledging that the life she’s leading is right for her, and that it was truly good for her to open herself up to that kind of love. Yes, we saw Brennan demonstrate that in the wake of Doctor in the Photo, and especially by the end of season 6, but that doesn’t mean that you don’t start reflecting on these things once in awhile, especially when confronted with your own mortality. I think that if Brennan really were able to meet her mother again, she’d probably want to hear that she was OK, and that it was acceptable to just be Temperance sometimes. Which maybe sounds a little dismissive, I don’t know. But remember, for instance, in Prince in the Plastic, where Brennan was reluctant to shed her clinical demeanour and “play” with the doll (for entirely valid reasons, mind you), then totally let go and had fun in the process? I think it’s the same sort of deal, on a much larger scale. Brennan often fights with herself, especially on personal issues, and I think she just wanted the person who used to be the most important influence on her life tell her it’s OK to shed those walls sometimes.
So, it comes back to that fight in the teaser, which was emblematic of the issues we have seen in the past two seasons. When Brennan’s buttons are pushed, her first defence is to retreat behind those walls, and cover everything up with her “brain.” She wants a baby because it’s selfish of her not to reproduce her exceptional genes, and she wants Booth to be the father because he’s an excellent breeder. Moving in together is a foolish investment. Buying a new house is unnecessary because the Iroquois men used to move into their mate’s home. The nanny is incompetent because she didn’t know the difference between Montessori and Waldorf curriculum. Booth shouldn’t take Christine to the carousel because she’ll get upset. They shouldn’t go on vacation because Christine would be more comfortable at home. As Angela astutely pointed out years ago, Brennan has an uncanny knack to rationalize the irrational, and that’s exactly what’s going on in these cases. Brennan used to hide behind her brain to avoid her emotions, even though she often didn’t realize it, because deep down it’s too painful. So when something touches upon a trigger issue for her — realizing she wants a family, making a permanent commitment to Booth (when her last example of permanency vanished), facing separation anxiety with Christine, becoming wholly dependent on others’ for her own happiness, whatever the deal was with the vacation (I still say it was related to this summer) — she tries to use her most reliable resource, her brain, to explain, or hide, what she’s feeling.
I don’t think Christine Senior’s speech is meant to convey that Brennan wore her heart on her sleeve and acted on pure emotion exclusively, and switched completely once her mother left. I think she knew Brennan was unbelievably smart, and used her big (rational) brain when viewing the world around her, so when these budding (hormonal) emotions emerged, she gave her daughter advice that was unfortunately taken too literally. That Temperance should approach the emotional the same way she approaches everything else.
But, I do think Brennan was irrevocably changed the day her parents left, and I’ve said that all along. It doesn’t mean that she was completely normal before, and only turned into a hyper-rational social misfit after. I figured what the trauma did was simply exacerbate her existing behaviour and traits. I think that once her parents left, she took her mom’s words and applied it to her life as a whole, and not just to one bad boy who her mom knew would break her heart. Because it turned out, instead, that her entire family broke her heart, and if her family, who was supposed to love her, did that to her, then what hope was there for anyone else? So, at that point, she stopped making any effort to connect with anyone else, because experience taught her it would only devastate her. That effort was not worth it to her, since she would end up disappointed and alone, in the end, and she could not go through that kind of pain again — because it crushed her.
Basically, what I’m trying to say is that I don’t doubt that aspects of Brennan’s personality that we know today — the awkwardness, the literalism, the rationality, the emotional struggles — probably existed before her parents left. But while she probably attempted to fit in with others in her own way before her parents vanished (remember the Cyndi Lauper story?), once they left, she effectively locked up her heart and didn’t even bother. Which, as her mom said, was necessary to a degree — because of the horrors she undoubtedly faced in foster care, and at school — it also denied her the experience of true friendship and love. That’s what meeting Angela and Booth gave her, and allowed her to let go of that.
(And, since I still believe this is all inside Brennan’s head, that she’s just sorting all of this out.)
Really, I don’t even know that this was even a conscious decision on her part. I could believe that Brennan shut down after her parents left — as she sort of implied in Man in the Fallout Shelter — and the process of locking herself out from her heart and from others was subconscious. And since this whole thing is a dream, to me, I could believe that this is Brennan finally acknowledging what happened to her.
(It kind of ties in to the end of Patriot in the Purgatory, where she tells Booth that she could shut the world out before she met him. That implies, to me, that there was some degree of choice in the matter, but that Booth breached those defences in spite of herself.)
On top of everything else, the part about Brennan finding the “little girl” in her? I think we’ve seen plenty of evidence of that in the past two years. I’ve noticed (and mentioned) lots of times that when Brennan is truly passionate about something, and throws herself into something, she does it with such zeal and disinhibition that she really is childlike, in a wonderful way. Even think back as recently as her zest for performing in Diamond in the Rough, but there are even other instances like her full-bodied giggling in But in the Joke, or the Nerf gun fight in Prince in the Plastic, to name a few. I know Mama Brennan didn’t mean it this literally, but it’s part of Brennan’s character: that when she is at her safest and most comfortable, she exhibits a pure love and enthusiasm you really only see in children, because she doesn’t get caught up in social convention of what is appropriate behaviour. Whether it’s her love of science, or her love of dance, she is consumed in a wonderful way with it. So, I think what her “mom” is trying to convey is that she shouldn’t be afraid to apply that same openness to other aspects of her life.
OK I NEED TO STOP THIS.
“If this was real, I’d tell you I love you. I miss you.” Oh, Brennan. I want to hug her, so badly. She’s like a lost little girl. That’s what it comes down to: deep down, she’s just a girl who desperately misses her mom.
It’s like how there are times when you’re feeling down, and all you want is to talk to your mom (or dad or best friend etc.) — but she hasn’t had that option since she was 15, and she longs for that.
(Man, I wish they’d addressed that before, too. I’ve been itching for Brennan to mention missing her mom since the season 7 premiere. At least it came out here.)
So yeah, I’m even more firmly in the camp of “Brennan is going through shit and missing her mom and is working that shit out in her subconscious/imagination/whatever while under the influence of adrenaline and anesthesia.”
Oh my goodness, the part where Brennan leans in and her mom kisses her on her forehead? IT DID ME IN. It’s just so tender, and like I’ve said, it’s a lot more vulnerable than we’ve ever really seen her. You know nobody’s done that to her in over 20 years, and that’s all she really wants from her mom. It’s such a loving gesture, which Brennan was denied for so long.
Um, Mrs. Brennan, your big secret message is that the first gift Max ever gave you was stolen? Er, Max has been a convicted thief and conman for his entire adult life (and probably then some). It’s not like that’s a big stretch for anyone to guess. Hell, I just always assume anything he’s got is stolen. (Remember when he stole a car as recently as this season’s premiere?)
… Which I am choosing to believe is just more of Brennan’s imagination/subconscious talking LALALALALA.
So, we’re back in 1991, and Brennan gets to watch her mom leave for a “normal” day. Since that was the day her life changed irreversibly.
Whoa, I’ve got to give Emily Deschanel props. No way would I ever let an HD camera zoom in on my face so tightly. NOT A CHANCE IN HELL.
(In other news, apparently the director wants us to know she has pretty eyes. Otherwise this shot is confusing.)
Apparently we’re back amongst the living, now.
Aw, Brennan’s so happy her little trip was worth it and they found the magicky blood nonsense to convict Sir Cecil, and Booth is so proud of her for going through all this just to get their evidence. (Well, to be fair, thanks to her, the motherfucker who tried to kill her will be convicted for it, so, I suppose it wasn’t altogether altruistic.)
Heh, Max’s Privacy Radar is in fine form tonight, and he realizes it’s his cue to vamoose! He can be sweet when he wants to be.
Aw, he’s going to tell the others she woke up, since they’re all out there waiting for news. Sniff. Our squint family, you guys.
Geez, again, Brennan looks way prettier just coming out of surgery than I could ever hope to on my best day.
Max, as I’ve said, you’re a lifelong thief, I’m pretty sure everybody can figure out that gifts you gave were stolen.
OK, what the fuck is with the random overhead shot in this scene? Is this supposed to mean Brennan’s mom is watching from above or something? Ugh.
“Good to see the old rhino can still be surprised.” BWAHAHAHAHA. Oh man. I love this family, so much. Way to talk about your pseudo-father-in-law, Booth. Remember that time Max kicked Booth in the nuts? Heh. Why haven’t we gotten the Thanksgiving Dinner of Airing of Grievances with these guys yet?!
Uuuuuuugh, I had an irrational moment of rage when Brennan started talking seriously about seeing her mother. I’m sorry. I can’t help it. I will spare you.
“It’s crazy to think that it’s true.” I totally knew what Booth’s next line was going to be before he even said it: “No, you know what, Bones? It’s OK to be a little crazy. Right?” Oh gee, it’s not like THAT IS THE THEME TO THIS SEASON OR ANTYHING. Come on, we all got flashbacks to “You’ve got a bit of crazy in you, too” and “I’m willing to do irrational things to prove [how much I love you]”, right?
Sigh. I do love Booth’s expression, though. He’s being nothing but comforting.
This is why I loved their dynamic regarding this topic so much in this episode, as opposed to, say, the birth scene in Prisoner in the Pipe. Yes, we know Booth is a believer, and has no trouble accepting that Brennan could be talking to her mother for real. But, he also knows that she isn’t a believer, and isn’t so quick to explain it as such. So, he lets her know that it’s alright for her to believe whatever it is she believes happened to her.
Here’s why that fact matters so much to me: the biggest problem I had with the birth scene in Prisoner in the Pipe (other than, you know, that it was in a fucking barn) is that Booth admonished Brennan with “why can’t you just admit that there is a mystery to life?!” WHILE SHE WAS IN FUCKING LABOUR. I know I’m a crazy person, but that rubbed me the wrong way and compiled with the backhanded way he tried to get Sweets to manipulate Brennan, made the episode, and that scene, unwatchable for me, for the most part. (It wasn’t the bickering that bothered me, since obviously they’d bicker while she’s giving birth. It’s that he was trying to force his opinion on her, the way I saw it.) On the other hand, I find the topic is handled with so much more sensitivity here. Yes, he believes in the afterlife and a higher power. No, she doesn’t, but can’t explain what is going on. He doesn’t push her to accept her experience as an outer-body or afterlife affair, and makes it clear he accepts whatever it is she interprets it as. I lovedthat. They may not believe in the same things, but they believe in each other, and that’s what matters. (Just like how in the previous episode, Brennan was able to understand how Booth’s faith drove him, and she admired him for it, even though it’s not a faith she shares.)
Sigh. They really are lovely, aren’t they?
Brennan’s chuckle is so sweet. But I also believe she’s probably on very powerful drugs right now, and would be chuckling at just about anything. Heh.
OK, guys, I love you two, but um… something tells me making out RIGHT AFTER SURGERY is probably a no-no.
But this is TV. TV is magic.
In other news: BOOTH IS TRYING TO MAKE OUT WITH BRENNAN IN A HOSPITAL BED. HEE.
It never gets old.
Told ya trying to paw at your girl right after surgery was a bad idea! Don’t hurt her, man!
Only, she’s being a giant fucking tease and is messing with him. She had him big time!
Seriously though, her “I’m joking!” chuckle is so adorable. I’m telling you, it’s the drugs talking. It doesn’t matter. She just loves him, you guys.
It reminds me of But in the Joke, where she freaked him out about the arrow in the head, and was proud of it. She sure has a funny way of pulling his leg.
(Is this some of that little girl coming out?)
HA. Booth will not be denied! Once he realizes his lady love is fine for Kissy Face, he jumps right back into it. “Let’s get this positioned right” OOH LA LA. You know, I’m pretty sure this behaviour would be frowned upon if Brennan had actually just been shot and then biopsied. But since this is TV, and they’ve already forgotten she just had her abdomen sliced upon less than 24 hours ago, what the fuck ever. NOW KISS.
Is Brennan grabbing onto his tie and/or lapels? Cause, I’m not gonna lie, I’ve been anxious to see that ever since B&B became a couple. Hot damn.
Speaking of hot damn, grabbing the back of his neck? YES PLEASE.
You guys. They love each other so much. So, so much. If there’s one take-home message to this episode, it’s that.
I mean, they practically both have hearts popping out of their eyes. They’re googly. It’s adorable.
(But, again with the damn overhead shot — please tell me that’s not supposed to be Brennan’s mom looking down on them? Please? It’s just some arty directing, right?)

And Now For A Lot Of Thoughts And Feelings About Thoughts And Feelings

Shot in the Dark was an ambitious episode, I guess would be a good way of putting it. And, I would believe, kind of a controversial one, too. At least, if the wide array of opinions I’ve seen about it are any indication. Even my own reaction was so conflicted that it took awhile to process.

It’s no secret that I had a lot of fears going into the episode, for a variety of reasons. The biggest one was the issue of Brennan’s near-death experience, and what exactly the writers were going for there. Brennan’s atheism is such a core tenet of her personality, and I really didn’t want them to mess with that. I know that is hypocritical, because there are other changes in Brennan that I’ve openly accepted and even cheered. I guess I see those other changes more as an evolution of her core, whereas any change in her atheistic beliefs would seem like a complete reversal? I never said I was consistent. The heart wants what it wants, or something like that. Anyway, what I’m trying to get at is that I was really hesitant to watch a story where Brennan “saw the light” or anything of the sort, because I really can’t see how that could coexist with Brennan’s empiricism. I mean, I even had trouble with Brennan’s “signs from the universe” approach inDoctor in the Photo. Needless to say I was very anxious.

I know many people who are devoted to their faith, as well as some who have said they’ve had some sort of experience — a vision, an apparition, a “sign,” etc. And I respect them immensely and don’t doubt that they experienced what they’ve said they have. But, I guess I’m just really stubborn, and really didn’t want that for Brennan. Mainly, because I hate the idea that people on TV who don’t believe in God or an afterlife are merely unenlightened, or have some grudge against God for a past trauma. Some people just don’t believe because it doesn’t fit into their world view, and that’s fine and should be respected. Brennan’s always been a shining example of that, and while it’s unfair of me to demand that the show live up to my own wishes or that it becomes some sort of role model it never asked to be, I just always really appreciated that her atheism was never an issue — nor was Booth’s Catholicism. They were both respected for their beliefs. And the notion that Brennan had to change that to somehow become more “human,” as some interviews I think implied, really, really bothered me.

What I’m trying to explain, terribly, is that this is probably why I was so hell-bent on interpreting Brennan’s experience in Shot as anything but an actual encounter with the afterlife. Like I said countless times, I know what the writers were implying, if not by the writing in the episode then by interviews promoting it. Iunderstand that we’re supposed to see this as Brennan facing something she cannot reduce to science, to accept that there are things in the world she can’t explain. The problem I have with that is that she’s already said that many times, like in season 5, and I don’t know why she needed this specific experience to believe in that. Other than the fact that the writers want her to believe in this “other place,” of course. That part of the equation disappoints me, and is why I wish they hadn’t gone there at all. So, I suppose that explains why I was so insistent on finding another way to interpret Brennan’s experience.

Luckily for me, I guess, the writers were ambiguous enough that I could easily spin my own logic into the episode. I mean, I understand their intention, but I suppose I’m just thankful that there’s enough breathing room there that I can “fanwank” to my heart’s content about this simply being Brennan’s brain’s reaction to trauma. Which is not to say it’s an experience to be dismissed. As I said the other night, I think there are some issues Brennan explored here that she had to confront, and this was a means to an end. She gave herself some closure regarding her mother, and I think will have come to some important realizations about herself as a mother and a partner, as well. Namely, that she’s got to trust in her heart and in herself, and in her relationships.

I don’t mean that Brennan doesn’t already do that. But, think about that fight in the beginning of the episode: she lashes out at Booth because she thinks he’s attacking her on what is probably her biggest trigger issue, her parenting. Tied in with that is her ability to be “fun,” and, I think, her role as a partner. We’ve seen this happen more than once in the past two seasons, and it’s clear that it’s a very deep insecurity of hers. And I think that it has a lot to do with her insecurity about her “open heart,” as she put it in the 100^th episode — she knows she has difficulty with her emotions, and she shut herself down for so long, that she’s still fearful that she won’t be able to jump those hurdles to be the mother Christine needs. She’s got lots of empirical evidence demonstrating that she is a competent mother, but she’s worried that she’s going to fail at it, particularly on an emotional level. Which is a concern all parents have to a degree, but Brennan has a tendency, I think, to worry over it more than most, given her history. Tangentially, I think she probably worries at times that she won’t succeed in her relationship, either. So, I think her mother’s “advice” is about her believing in herself, as cheesy as that sounds. That she can trust that her love is going to be enough, that she is giving her family what they need. That she can give in to those moments of whimsy we’ve seen from her, that who she is is enough, for herself and for her loved ones.

I think the episode was curious, because while it was framed as being a game-changer with major revelations, it wasn’t really. Which is not a criticism, per se. To me, it was another episode that was more about a character study than a bombshell. In that sense, plot-wise, I felt that it was a little pointless. Like I said at several points, there really wasn’t anything in this episode that we learned that we didn’t already know. We knew Brennan closed herself off as a result of her parents’ disappearance. We know that she struggles with allowing herself to give in to her emotions, at times. We know that she’s flourishing now. Moreover, based on the show’s history, I doubt there’s going to be serious “fallout” from it — mainly because it’s all information we knew, and I can’t see what will seriously change in the immediate future. Except for one thing, which I will get to in a minute.

As I repeated on a couple of occasions in this recap, I think the take-home message here is that we’ve gained insight into where Brennan’s headspace is at. Which, arguably, is not the most exciting of stories. However, I really do think that some viewers need that kind of stuff spelled out sometimes. For instance, it’s been obvious to me that Brennan’s parents’ disappearance was what sent her retreating within herself so completely. Again, it’s not to say that Brennan was an outgoing, social kid before her parents left, and then turned into the woman we know today. She’s likely always struggled with her emotions, and likely was a misfit. But, I do think that there are some viewers out there who underestimate the impact Brennan’s parents’ disappearance had on her — I mean the fans who think Brennan’s a robot or unfeeling. So, to me, this episode was about displaying just how traumatic that event was, and just what Brennan lost when she woke up that morning at 15 years old.

In the same vein, I don’t think we’re meant to believe Brennan hasn’t already been flourishing, but just like her childhood trauma, I think some people need to be told that Brennan’s been evolving, and happily so. And I also think that Brennan needs to be reminded of it when she’s under stress. Just like it seems like what she “learned” here was to trust her heart, I think that maybe she needs to trust that she really is happy, and that happiness isn’t fleeting and won’t be ripped away. At least, not in the way it was as a child. She can’t predict the future, and anything could happen, but the point is that everything it’s taken to get to where she is, and where she will be going, is worth it, and that she can’t lead her life by being scared of the “unknown.” Which, arguably, she learned in season 6, but maybe the point they’re making is that when Brennan is under duress, she still questions herself, and she needs to be reassured that the “flourishing” she’s been doing is worth the risk.

More importantly, to me, is that we got to see Brennan, the daughter. Yes, we see her with Max several times a year, but if there’s one relationship I was always fascinated by, it’s Brennan and her mother. I was itching to see that explored, but I admit I couldn’t fathom how that would be doable. I had hoped in season 7 that we’d hear Brennan speak about her mom, so that we could meet her that way. I even hoped, in fantasy land, that we might get flashbacks, though I knew that would never happen because Bones has never really been amenable to that, season 1 excluded. So, while I am not a fan of the afterlife idea at all, I do appreciate that this technique was a way through which we could see Christine Brennan — and that is who we met, because it was Brennan’s image of her mother — and more significantly, Brennan’s interaction with her.

I loved seeing Brennan so vulnerable and unguarded, in a way we rarely see (or at least, in a way we rarely saw before season 7). It’s a strange thing to say, given that she was fighting for her life, but witnessing her let her guard down, asking her mom all the things she’s wondered about that day 20 years ago, and about her life choices since then, was a real treat for me. I mean, Brennan’s “I loved you,so much” pretty much said it all for me. I’ve said this many times, but Brennan absolutely adored her mom, and I appreciated that we got to see her express that. Especially in light of the fact that the last time she saw her mom, she didn’t get to tell her that. And yes — that particular piece of of information was manipulative storytelling to infuse even more angst into Brennan’s childhood, but what can I say, I’m a sucker for the family’s story and I was fine with it. I actually never thought I’d ever really get to see much exploration of the Brennan family history, because there’s little time in an episode for personal stories that are so far removed from the case of the week (which is why Woman in Limbo andJudas on a Pole are so wonderful to me, since the family is part of the case). The dynamics just really grip me, and are one of my favourite parts of the series. Just like Max said, they were a happy family, once upon a time, and that’s so easy to lose sight of when you focus on what led to the implosion of their unit.

Following that, I wonder if part of the purpose of Brennan revisiting her childhood home, where she was the most comfortable and secure until she was 15, is going to make her reflect on what she wants for her own family as an adult. It’s obvious that Brennan’s family was her world as a child — admittedly as it is with most children, but probably especially so for someone like her who we know had problems relating to her peers — and I would expect revisiting her past would make her think about what she wants to incorporate into her home, though I guess that’s something she and Booth would have already discussed as they built their family. I would think that Brennan, remembering just how much she loved her mother, would want to impart the same love onto Christine that her mom did to her. (Not that she isn’t already, but, she’s now aware of it.) Similarly, just as Max said that their family was happy together, I wonder if Brennan wants to try to recreate that same togetherness in her own family. (Which is interesting, if you think about it, since Booth’s family life, as far as we know, was the complete opposite.) Or, maybe, the point is that Brennan has managed to recreate that same safety and security in her own family. I don’t even know. I’ve been talking abut this for too long.

Really, though, I still firmly believe that this entire plot is a means to an end for the rest of the season, and that end is to change Brennan’s mind about marriage. Not the least reason is because Hart Hanson has all but said that’s the end game for the show, if not this season. They’ve planted the seeds since season 7 (e.g. Booth insisting Brennan is going to propose to him), and they’ve dropped more hints this season — the “free agents” argument, discussing their long-term future always assuming they’ll still be together, planning their funerals together, etc. More to the point, they’ve given us clues about Brennan’s perspective in general shifting — or, rather, revealing what she’d kept “locked away” for so long. For instance, the infamous “I love you and I’m willing to do irrational things to prove it to you” line in Partners in the Divorce, or the “crazy” teasing both last season and in this episode, or Booth’s line in the teaser about not always having to do the rational thing, or Brennan’s mom’s advice about following her heart, or what I think is probably the biggest anvil, her telling Booth that she feels like he’s the one who keeps calling her back (from near-death). I think this season’s journey for Brennan is going to be about accepting that even when it’s not “rational,” following her heart is OK when it comes to love. Meaning, there are tons of reasons not to get married — divorce stats, whatever inequality she sees in it, the uncertainty of the future, etc. But, reflecting on what she wants for her family, like the family she had growing up, it is OK for her to change her mind on the subject and remain true to who she is. She can allow herself to believe that she is going to be with Booth for the rest of her life (which, I think she already has, even if she doesn’t verbalize it), and commit to that if she wants to. It might be predictable, but I wouldn’t be surprised if the purpose of the near-death experience is for Brennan to re-evaluate what her priorities are regarding how she envisions the future of her family. The whole “near-death experience leads a character to want to marry their partner” thing is a cliché for a reason.

In spite of the fact that I choose to believe that Brennan’s experience in this episode is a creation of her own mind, and not part of some other world, that does not make her experience any less real. The emotional roller coaster she goes through is real, the feelings it stirs in her are real, her understanding of what happened is real. That’s the important part — it is real to her, and the fact that it may be a figment of her imagination does nothing to undermine the seriousness of what she understands of it. So whether it happened “for real” or not, the message she takes home, and the peace she receives from it, are very, very salient to her, and I think that’s something to remember.

I have to say, I kind of wish this episode had happened next season, because it’s supposed to be so monumental, but I feel like it’s almost likely to get lost in the shuffle amidst all the intense Pelant business this season. Actually, if I’m being totally honest, I feel like a lot of what I suspect the (minimal) aftermath of this episode will be further down the line should have been fallout from the Pelant arc in last season’s finale and this season’s premiere. (Which I wish had been explored more, since it’s all but been forgotten.)

On a more practical note, I was surprised by the fact that I wasn’t bothered at all by the lack of suspense in this episode. Because I don’t think that was the point. Obviously, Brennan wasn’t going to die, because she’s the title character, and Emily Deschanel’s on contract for at least another season. Which is still the case in other “hero in peril” episodes. Unlike those episodes, though, the resolution of their situation wasn’t the main focus of the story. The reason why Aliens in a Spaceship or Two Bodies in a Lab or Hero in the Hold were so thrilling was because the point of he story was figuring out how the team was going to save Brennan or Booth (or Hodgins). But in Shot, we knew right off the bat what happened to Brennan, and we had a pretty good idea early on who the culprit was. The real driving force of the story, to me, was Brennan’s experience with her mother, and the understanding of herself and her family she gained as a result of it. So, despite the “big action” that started the episode, I think it was actually a very quiet, introspective affair, all things considered. I don’t think it was meant to be a big shoot-’em-up episode like the Pelant ones, for example. It was more about the exploration of the Brennan family, which of course now includes Booth. I actually of view it as this season’s Doctor in the Photo.

To finish up, I want to say that I see Brennan’s visions, whatever they are, as the flip side to Booth’s coma dream in End in the Beginning. Not just because they are both apparently induced by trauma and/or anesthesia, but because I think they’re two sides to the same coin. There are the obvious parallels between the two scenarios, but I think they deal with a lot of the same issues, particularly for Brennan. Even though what we saw on-screen in End was apparently Booth’s dream, it was Brennan writing the book and supposedly providing the ideas. What we saw there was Brennan letting her guard down in an attempt to distract herself from Booth’s medical condition, and in so doing she revealed a lot about her character at the time that she seemingly couldn’t voice out loud, or hadn’t even realized about herself. Namely, that she could envision a life for herself with Booth, in which they were in love, committed to each other completely and starting a family. So it’s intriguing to me that when Brennan is in a similar position, she is again envisioning a life with her family, only this time it’s the family she actually used to have. We know Brennan has a very vivid imagination, but I think it’s a really interesting parallel that in another moment of extreme duress, she goes to a similar place. Except, the family she imagined with Booth is reality, so her “dream” (or experience or whatever you call it) is also grounded in reality. It speaks volumes, to me, about the richness of Brennan’s internal life, which we only get snippets of on the show.

(Or, it means Booth and Brennan both need to stay away from anesthesia because it gives them freaky dreams, I don’t know. The couple that trips together stays together?)

Wow. If you’ve made it this far you get a cookie. Or something. I don’t even know. I think my brain is broken. I still don’t know that I’ve fully sorted out my feelings on this episode (even though I’ve written a giant fucking novel about it), but I guess the fact that the show can still keep me thinking like this is a good sign. The important thing, for me, is that I was entertained. It wasn’t a perfect episode by any means, but the good far outweighed the bad for me, and I always appreciate insight into our characters, especially this far into a series. And since I’m a glutton for any development of the Brennan family story, I was pretty happy, all around. Sure, I might had to twist my brain in knots to not want to spend an hour raging after the episode aired, but, delusion makes the world go round. Or something. I don’t know. What?

Er, I have a feeling I’m going to have to take a hiatus after this. My brain may be permanently fried.

But before I go, I just want to thank those of you who listened to me rant, and replied to my whiny posts or messaged me to calm my nerves. You guys are treasures, and I can’t tell you how much I appreciated each and every word. You’re what make this whole Tumblr experience so lovely.

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Shot Through The Dark, And You’re To Blame

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